SUPPORT GROUP - INFERTILTY

hi ah kat,
welcome back to the thread
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I had the same remark from MIL during my mini confinement after mc. Was v v upset with MIL and told my hubby to tell her not to mention anything abt bb anymore. my hubby sat down and talk to MIL, I did too..and now she understands. During CNY, she didnt mention a single word abt bb, only wish me good career.

Guess you need to talk to hubby seriously on what you are going thru..like what babydust said, take it easy abt ttc...if it comes, it will come..
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Hi ladies, sorry to intrude

Wud like to know if fibroid can cause m/c? will it cause another m/c if it is not removed?
 
Hi JKJT, please don't say "sorry" ..

This is meant to be for sharing.

To answer your question..
IMHO .. gynae are the best candidate. Try to get at least 2 opinions.
It really depends on the position of the fibroid. thus i had tot gynae's would know best.
 
<font color="0077aa">Ladies,</font>
went to c my gynae just nw for my PAP smear test... she asked me when m i going to try for a 2nd bb? i told her i had given up! she was surprised n asked Y? i told her both DH n i wouldn't want to go thru the stress n disappointment over again n again...

she asked me wouldn't i want to consider abt the programs i.e. IUI, IVF, etc... they provide? i told her No cos my DH is not very keen n supportive for me to try on IUI, IVF, etc... n i myself wouldn't want to try too!!!

i feel better telling her abt our decision on giving up hope on TTC!!!

<font color="0077aa">Dorothy,</font>
Kdrama again!!! recently i m watching the new series starring Kim Jae-won... the series where he acted as a gangster... i think the show called The Greatest Expectation n Wei(3)Da(4)DeYi(2)Can(3) in chinese!!
 
VQ *hugz*

kat *hugz* dun be sad

toy collector thats bad leh .... i hate ppl who abort babies .....
 
VQ - at least u have 1 bb. Its disappointing enough for us when we trying for 1st one still don hv good news.
 
Hi gals,

need some advise.
I'm going for IUI this round. Any idea what i'll go through?
 
Hi ladies,

In the end, have a BIG fight with Hubby - one of the biggest fight since we got married.
Blow my top and told him to go and talk to his mum & relatives.

He promise that he will go talk to MIL..hopefully things can get better
 
*hugs* ah kat...cool down. Hope things will improve...meanwhile, stay in good spirit n let out your frustrations here...we are here to listen.
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ya man ..... kat keep cool!

babydust i agree with u leh ..... hope i can have one soon b4 piggy go ....

ahahah Now waiting for mensus to come then can start my clomid
 
<font color="0077aa">Qinging,</font>
Thanks for ur hug!

<font color="0077aa">Babydust,</font>
Yes, i agree! at least i hv 1bb... but i feel just as sad that i couldn't give her a sibling!! u can c her desire to hv 1 when she stare at other children playing happily with their siblings!! i feel very guilty abt it! my DD is very angry when she saw that her schoolmate punch his little sister hard on her back.. so my DD very sayang this little sister!!! she always tell me that only if she is her little sister n she will love her very much... i m touch!!

sometimes, my DH n i think. r we better if we dont even hv 1 child? cos i hv double sadness nw, 1) cant conceive myself.. 2) cant give my DD a sibling....

so whosoever got pregnant n give birth.. rest for a mth n start conceiving 2nd bb immediately.... "Hit Metal when Hot"
 
YES YES I agree..should have started intensive when 1st child is 1 yr old...but i was too tired then... but now i want but still waiting..

qing qing... yes i do envy those who abort their child- they conceived so easily but their situation might not be favourable for the child.. that 's y they choose to abort which is very sad.
 
tub / Ladies

I have MIA in this thread for a while. I did 3 rounds of IUI in NUH before. Need to start clomid on CD2 for 5 days, fix appointment for U/scan on CD12 to monitor the growth of the follicles. May need to scan for 2 to 4 times (depending on each individual) until the doc think that the follicle is of the correct size and he will determine the date of the procedure. Need to go to a GP for a jab to trigger ovulation about 36 hours prior to the procedure. On the actual day, your HB will need to submit his semen to the lab in the morning, about 2 hours before the procedure. The procedure itself is quite fast, less than 15 mins; similiar to doing pap smear test.

Hope this helps.
 
Hi ladies, thanks for the hug here...I really blow my top last week and had scream and shout like a mad woman - guess deep inside me I havent really recover from the m/c & is under huge stress w TTC...anyway, life goes on after letting the frustration out - be going to c a TCM at Yu Ren Sheng coming Sat..hope that TCM can help me at least to regulate the menses....

ah_kat
 
VQ - u shldnt think that way, sometimes things are beyond our control. Wat u can do to ur 1st child is to provide more concern and love for her.
 
Ah_kat - i also shout and scream last mth. I can understand the stress and emotions u had in u...its better after letting out rite.
 
<font color="0077aa">Babydust,</font>
of cos both DH n i shower my DD with LOVES n CONCERNS.... not only us in fact my whole family are. My DD is the only grandchild to my parent. DD is also the only niece to my elder bro, sis n all my cousin.... everybody LOVE her so much... another reason Y DD gets all the attention is bcos she is a premature baby... so everybody sayang her until botak....!!! hahaha...

anyway, to my DD i hv only guilty.... i cant help to feel guilty towards her.. not bcos i dont love her.. i love her too much.. i give her the best.. so good that all her classmates n friends envy her!

for my DH view abt TTC 2nd bb, unless i can hv a smooth pregnancy n labour.. if not, he is not supportive for me to try the treatments... he said he had enough of my sufferings during my pregnancy with DD... he says he nearly breakdown during those days, he cried behind my back everytime he c me suffer where he cant of any help at all... i had enough too!!!

so its a pact that we settle for 1 n recently in process of adopting a baby girl...
 
sigh... i am in the same the situation... recently, we thought of coverting one of our rooms to my gal room(she is 7 yrs)...

she is planning the things in her room... also she told us when baby comes, she wan bb to sleep with her... so that she can feed bb...

she kept asking us why she is the only child....
once she was with my church friend's children, the children fights, my gal told the gal" dont fright, play with yr gor gr nicely.. unless u got someone to play with..
 
hi ah kat,
*hugs* understand truly. i hugged my dog and cried..watched Tyra Bank's show, cried. Sometimes wonder if i ever get to wear all those maternity clothes i bought when preggie..wonder if i will ever spot a bump on my stomach...

TCM is good...will regulate mensus and improve egg quality...hope u will feel better emotionally and physically after the treatment.
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eh .... i bought clothing which i can wear during pregnant time ... but till now havent got a chance yet .....

sigh .... i am still bleeding a bit so hard to calculate the time wonder how like that sigh.
 
<font color="0077aa">Dorothy,</font>
that's the case! cos they dont hv a sibling so when they c other children fight, they will tell the children to love each other instead..
 
hi vq and dor, my son still enjoying been the only 1 BUT i find it very diff to do things when i am alone with him cos he kept saying nobody plays with him etc... even if i have anyother 1 by then he will be 4 or 5 n need another 3 yrs b4 can play or fight with him..

but i think it better to have a sibling so that when i passed on at least he will have someone to be there with him..
 
hi

Same situation with toy_collector, vq and dor. I feel really bad because my boy is the only child. I try to give him the best because he is the only 1. After 7 failed IUIs, I don't have the courage to go for IVF anymore.

I asked my hb about this and he is against the IVF option. He cited 2 main reaons: financial and emotional pressure. Financially, it will be costly and emotionally, it will be trying as well.

Somtimes I look at my son and I feel really bad. Being the only grandchild, he really has no one to play with. So the constant worry that I have is what will happen to him when we pass on. My hb thinks that I should not be so pessimistic but I still think about it.

I have ruled out adoption for the simple reason that I am not 100% confident that I can be impartial to both children. I don't think those around me can - e.g. the grandparents and etc And I cannot bring myself to adopt a kid if I cannot fullfil that.

I feel better these days because I have "resigned" myself to fate. I am still seeing chinese sinseh and still harbouring very slim hope that god might send a little angel to me. But by and large, I have already accepted that I will probably just have 1 child.
 
Yes Jade..i also dunno what to do ..i cant cont taking clomid..coming to a year i guesss... but i just refused to give up.. so still trying naturally with clomid..if not maybe at most another iui cos ivf is really a bit ex..unless i receive an inheritance from some kind people ( ha ha!) cos i dun gamble so no way i can strike in lottery or 4d..

yesterday went to fetch son a grand mother fetching her grandson also told me to hurry but such thing how to hurry....

u wont believe my house is piled up with so many toys but cos i wanted my son to have playmates to play with him so i tend to buy more sets of utensils, more balls, more cars etc..
 
Ya...till now I still keep my son's toys and his stuff. Recently was finally thinking of selling away some of his stuff since I am still not pregnant. Been keeping it all this while hoping that I will get to use it soon. I console myself and said that if I really get pregnant I can always get new ones. I am running out of space for his old toys/prams/walkers and clothes.

Nowdays I share my fertility problems with my relatives and friends. Got tired of lying. So just tell them straight - yes I have secondary fertility problems. On TCM. Their natural first reaction is always "but why? You already have a child!" I always tell them - I have no clue but it is a fact. They will back off a little usually.

Important thing is I need to recognise the fact that I might not be able to have a 2nd child. I think I have gradually accepted it and nowadays I feel better, lighter in my heart.

I try to focus on making myself look better! :)Facials, dressing and etc Afterall, I need to live for myself too.
 
qing, D&C is dilation and cutteage - procedure for taking out not surviving foetus after a miscarriage.

Why mensus so long? is it normal?
 
<font color="0077aa">Jade,</font>
i am like you.. i focus on my looks now!!! recently, i change my cosmetics.. i THROW AWAY all the old ones n bought new ones!!! YES, all the OLD ones including the brushes, etc... hahaha..... but 1 thing i cant change is.. my weight..... just cant go down... hahahaa...
 
VQ,

*high fives*

I have been paying more attention to skin care products, facial masks and etc :)

Also, I am trying to exercise more frequently now and I went for body toning treatments.

I have been quite slagged all this while because I was telling myself that I cannot exercise and do much if I want to conceive. And that was also part of the reason that made me feel down. It was like a vicious cycle - I don't feel good abt myself - my body and my weight, I tell myself I cannot exercise too much, I cannot colour my hair, I cannot perm my hair - in case I am pregnant. So the frustrations start when I repeatedly fail to conceive. I felt trapped.

So since I have gone easy - I have permed my hair, coloured my hair, start exercising, go for body treatments, changed my wardrobe...and I felt GREAT!

As for shedding off weight, I believe you can do it VQ. Do you exercise now? Try exercising. Start with jogging. I feel it helps. Though gradual. Body treatments are not too bad too. I tried LPG treatments and they did tone my thighs. :)
 
Hi Gals, can i check if anyone here knows or is also a PCOSer ... whether base on my hormone values below at CD2, do you think i am having PCOS?

The reason why i asked is 2 doctors i went to, seen this same hormone test report and 1 said i have PCOS but another said i dont have. I am confused and want to seek a 3rd opinion but thought i can try to find out from you gals here first if anyone can shed some light?

The gynae who said i have PCOS also have my ovaries scanned on CD12 and there was 4-5 really small (1.7mm) cysts on both ovaries and 1 ready to mature and ovulate (16mm).

The 2nd gynae who said i dont have PCOS reminded me that my LH is ok and i am not overweight and have very regular menses so no strong case for PCOS.

I dont know who to believe. They both have facts to back their diagnosis.

Anyone can share with me normal hormone values and whether i am sick or not, pls do, thanks very much for enlightenment!!
 
Hi Jade and VQ,
Like u gals, i have also moved on...to beautifying myself..hee..have signed up a slimming program..coloured my hair and have been going for mani and pedicure.
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agree w/jade that it is a vicious cycle...kept thinking i could be preggie and stopped all exercises etc...in the end, i gained about 10kgs in 2006 with two mcs behind me...

better start being discipline again...
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applemuffins .... oh so that is d/c .... ok i dunno why mensus so long leh ... abit abit only not much leh dunno why like that .... and i went or blood test hor my doc never tell me abt this level one wor .... sigh can i call KK and ask them to give me the result?
 
qing, if in doubt, always good to check w yr gynea...afterall u pay them consultation fee
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bleeding after D&C is normal..usually will last 4-5 days sometimes even longer. Take care.
 
hmmmmm ..... maybe inside haywire liao wor ...... sigh i am waiting to finish and day14 can do do muhahaha and see Got result bo whether am i ovuluating ......
 
<font color="0077aa">Jade/ Applemuffin,</font>
i hired a personal trainer to train 3 times a week in a gym... i went down of course BUT this CNY bring my weight back liao!! hahhaa...... really kena scold by my trainer liao....!!! But i long time nvr go liao... cos recently hv sleeping disorder due to watching of DVDs til late night!!!

recently, i finally accepted the best slimming program is to EXERCISE!!!
 
VQ,
agree...i booked my slimming program..but still hasnt start on it yet...sigh...promise myself to go diligently this week onwards...
find personal trainer v siong....i did once, he kept pushing me to exercise....not easy..hee...u quite good ahh...can tahan..
 
<font color="0077aa">Applemuffin,</font>
mine is a lady trainer. i m embarrass to hire a male trainer.. hahaha... n my DH said NO if my trainer is a male... hahaha....

OF COURSE.. he will keep on pushing u to exercise lah!!! what is he there for? TO PUSH U TO EXERCISE lah!!!! cos we r all lazy pigs.. hahha....

not that i can tahan.. u pay $$ liao wor!!! i quite enjoy it.... cos not every session in the gym.... sometimes go stadium climb staircase... good to hire a trainer is that.. at least now i know how to operate some of the weird looking gym equipment...

we encourage each other....
 
agree vq, gym equipment can be daunting...pls help to "encourgage" me to lose weight....i am closing to 60kgs now......feel really fat n down....
 
i am fat oso hahahah ... for me i took up yoga course is a little too slow but i think it helps oso by stretching I got less ache here and there liao ...... heheh oso must cut down carbo! kekeke cannOt eat so much ..... but i sprain my hand cant cook have to call delivery ... u know mostly are fastfood hahahah ,.... charm i think i gain weight again next mth go see my thyroid doc he sure scold me hahahaha
 
<font color="0077aa">Qingqing,</font>
yoga is out for me.. too slow liao.... i went for pilates instead BUT as slow as yoga.. can u imagine i fell asleep on the mat instead... hahaha.....

<font color="0077aa">Ladies,</font>
i saw 1 of my DD's classmate mom just nw... she's is pregnant... Guess what? this is her 7TH Child!!! if not of a m/c, this would be no.8TH!!!

OH! how i wish we hv her womb!!!
 
<font color="0077aa">Applemuffin,</font>
yeah...VERY FERTILE indeed... she do not hv any precaution at all.... she said she gonna give birth until she cant... WOW!!!! she intends to give birth until she is abt 50s.. or maybe 70s.... OMG!!!

Maybe she can reconsider to be a surrogate mother.... if this is legal in spore, right?
 
<font color="0077aa">Ladies,</font>
to add: she is not those haggard looking mommy hor!! she is very very pretty n young in her early 30s....
 
vq, so so envious...but what to do? i am not like her...i am almost hitting mid 30s...dried old prune, cant lay eggs.........sob sob.......
 
VQ, noooo....dont resign to fate but learn to take it easy. learn to enjoy life w/o kids and mentally convince ourselves that it is ok, it is no fault of ours that we have no kids. and if we could, try on those fertile days, when we strike, count our blessings, if we dont, look forward to next mth and meantime, go pamper ourselves..we deserve happiness like any others.
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<font color="0077aa">Applemuffin,</font>
i alway "drug" myself by saying my DD is going to be 7YO this yr.. if i hv another bb, i will hv to go thru the cycle again.. bringing big bags n small bags... cannot go here cant go there... hv to be home early...etc... so troublesome...

BUT, i dont mind all these hassle actually.... hahhaa....
 
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