(2009) Twins/ Triplets/ Multiples mummies to be

Sophia and Spiffy
I AGREE WITH YOU LOH...i am a control freak too. i cant bear letting others to take care of my bbs for fear that they will recognize maid as their mummy..when i go back study and eventually work, maid and mummy will be the main carer..how ah?? I also think i ki siao liao. As i am typing this msg, i am punching and keyboard with aggresiion.....
 


Sophia and Spiffy
And precisely coz i know i will bey gam wan to leave them, i have installed cameras around my house to see them when i am outside...Also to monitor maid in case mum needs to go marketing or we want to go out as a family without the maid..
 
imakeitrain -- wah you so fierce to your mil! so brave! haha. For me, I put on a smile infront of others and then take it out on my husband behind closed doors hahah. Quite two-faced :p

Yah yah should have a meet up one day. Who wants to take the lead in trying to organise one, anyone???

Abt being a control freak. Initially I also wanted to do everything myself. Didnt like the idea of others, esp a domestic helper, feeding and bathing my babies. But my idealistic world came crashing down hahah and I've since learnt to appreciate other's help because it makes me a less tired, saner and happier person. A friend once told me, changing X number of diapers doesnt make you a better parent, so whatever u can just outsource. When she said that I was like aiyoh how can like that one ... but errrr now I take her stance on things hahaha.
 
Chameleon
I agree with your sentence on "changing x number of diapers doesnt make you a better parent"...hmmm food for tot... i have to be realistic lor.. so trying to come to terms... showed my maid my camera today and what it can show...in a way hinting to her "you are under watchful monitoring"
 
i think all mommies want to do everything they can for their babies and more.. like everyone wants to be supermom! i'm more middle ground really, like i agree with chameleon tt changing x no of diapers doesnt make u a better parent, but at the same time i'd rather do it myself cos i want some stuff to be done my way if i leave it to others i may not like it and then there'll be more probs. so watever i have an opinion on, or feel more strongly about, i will do myself.
my indo maid is pretty gd, she can handle my younger boy very well (he's abit difficult n fussy), which makes me happy, altho pple ask me how can i let my maid be so close to my son blahblah. haha my answer is always this, i'd rather let my maid handle my son than my MIL cos 1) i can TELL my maid exactly what i want her to do, i can't do that to my MIL. 2) when her contract expires, she can't bring my son back to indo anyway.
so yah, tts how i have a peace of mind while i go back to work.

spiffy
not firece to MIL all the time lah..that time really buay tahan. cos i always tiamtiam then she climb over my head wanna take my sons sleep with her all the nonsense. so i explode lor, i find that dg that is more effective than complaining to hb, cos i find that after awhile, hb also sian. explode once in awhile then pple will take u seriously. lol.
my boys hardly latch on now, all ebm. try eating oatmeal, think it helps. i was prescribed doridone after i delivered cos i kept telling doc i didnt have milk, in the end i think over stimulation, then hahah i had really bad engorgement.

76
serious ah! wah where u buy from, got audio not? i feel like installing, but not cos of my maid but cos of my MIL. she likes to tell my sons bad things abt me..
 
imakeitrain
I bot mine from sim lim sq brand called TP Link 1 camera $150..bot 2 le..thinking of buying 2 more.put 1 in each bedroom and 1 in living room. Its wireless - well you got to plug the elctricity lah, other than that, no long wire running around.. With that, i can view whats happening from any pc/laptop outside house by keying in an IP address (huby fix that)...and can also link to hp so it is really on the go monitoring kind of thing..but we havent explored the hp part yet..As for audio, shld have ba, havent explored..coz we wanted something visual first...hahaha..been v good so far, but got 1 problm...mum says so inconvenient for her..she need to rem to cover the camera or swtch off befre she changes clothes in her room, if not become another scandal..hahah
 
hahaha yr mother very cute la! hmm i think weekend i shall go see, but i think hubby will not be v receptive to idea, i mean of cos i will not say its to monitor his mother! do u think it will go unnoticed by pple in the house?
 
imakeitrain
I purposely tell maid i have camera. My purpose is to preempt anything from happening with she knowing the existence of the camera. So, i would rather she wayang how well she treats my sons infront of the cameras, instead of 'ill-treating' my sons or even wearing my clothes and bra thinking nobody is watching. Coz by the time she does all these, damage would have been done...i mean my sons could have got hurt..no matter how many cameras i have also no use...so my stand is to tell and be explicit.. If your house got maid, then suggest tell your MIL (and hubby) you wana monitor maid coz you read many horror stories... blah. Then quote recent articles lah, so many..tdy got another one..if MIL says she is at home to monitor, you say dunwan her to be too tired from monitoring her..in case MIL needs to nap, she can go and sleep in peace...and most importantly, say you wana see your kids when you are outside coz you miss them...awwwwww..... i clever hor?
 
imakeitrain
Or and not forgetting,please remember to say it with an innocent xiao tian tian face adn expression to score points
 
76
i think i will not succeed in convincing them abt the cam.. lol xiao tian tian face!! omg, i dun have lor, my MIL says my face v un friendly, not pleasant to look at! soo rude rite, silly old toad. anyway so far hows yr monitoring, yr maid really wayang?
 
Imakeitrain
So far, i am at home..Tdy is my last day of No Pay Leave..Next week i will know if the wayang opera is excitng to watch.I told her i no need her to wayang or show wat..even if she breaks my household appliances or cups or glass (wch she has done ranging from toilet brushes to toilet window to bowls), i will not scold her or ask her to pay...but if my bbs kenna anything, eg hurt due to her negligence, i will make sure she 'pays' (aka send her back to agent)..i make it v explicit...she understands
 
imakeitrain
remember?I am v the protective de... coz i waited v long for my bbs and went thru quite a bit..am sure those mummies who went thru some tribulations will understand what i mean. And i make no apologies for that lor...
 
76
no need to apologise lor! mommies MUST be protective of our babies. i myself am not up to standard really, cos its abit taxing then im abit slack la. i think i better up my ante abit, well one thing i learnt from my friend who is also fiercely protective of her kids, better be safe than sorry. and i totally agree with that, jus that sometimes really i v tired liao, so i just give in to MIL, or whoever, which compromises my own stand. so terrible right, compromise my childrens safety.
 
imakeitrain
Actually it din dawn on me that today is my last day till i downloaded my lecture notes.. But the purpose of me going to studies is to be with my kids for a longer period of time before i go back to work next yr.. After my 4mth ML, i took 6mth NPL, then now study leave followed by work lor..so, in effect, like almost 2 yrs before i go work..think i will have withdrawal syndrome.
 
And here I was thinking I'm over protective of my babies. I guess its just the natural maternal instinct to want to be the main caregiver.

Sophia what happens if a baby is inconsolable in IFC? I wonder if they carry them or use pacifiers or...? Im also scared of inconsistent 'parenting' which might pose a problem at night or at home.

We're thinking of a belated man yue for them on their 2nd month actual age (CA -2 mth) and wonder if it's too early cos tecnically they haven't reached 40 weeks yet. Basically scared of pple touching their cheeks and kissing them. I can tell pplnot to carry but how to not touch?
 
Spiffy
In my opinion, i would suggest holding back the manyue to 1 yr old... I wanted to postpone my manyue to 3-4mths too..but was advised better not... besides the cuddling and pinching, dun forget the germs and all, bbs are also easily startled at the age and wats more with so many unfamiliar faces surrounding them.. So, in the end, wait till 1 yr after having brought them around and understanding more thoroughly their temperament than do i dare to think abt holding a gathering.. i dare not even call it a party..dun wan guests to come with the high expectations..scarly bbs cry and wail...then my 'party' will be deemed flop..so, i prefer to call it gathering...coz it connotes a grouping and coming together of adults....heheheh... i think too much rgt?
 
Regarding the security cameras: I have 2 real ones at home and the rest are all dummies. Got them really cheap online. They look the same as the real ones. So, when my maid came on the first day, I told her of the cameras and told her that I will be watching her at my work place on my computer, so she better watch herself. So far so good.

I also dun know how if they are inconsolable in IFC. Till now it has not happen (touch wood). I guess they will carry them lor.

Cant wait for June hols, at least I can spend some alone time with my twins. I'm thinking on those days that I don't have to go school, will spend one on one time with each of them.
 
76, all our relativEs and friends keep asking when they can see the babies and we can't hold them off much longer despite my sending them pics. So we figured having one gathering is better than a thousand visits to our home. Another option is holding it in their actual first month acc to their EDD. They will be 3 mth old then.

I agree about the part about their temperament.. Hope they won't cry..Otherwise I'm sure a few ppl would jump at the chance to carry them, eek.
 
spiffy
i wanted to hold mt kids manyue using their corrected age (from my edd) but then my MIL vetoed my idea, and scare me by saying that its some pantang thing that small kids are not allowed to celebrate anything except the real manyue and 1 yr bday. so i didnt. but i think on the other hand also good.. cos they were unsettled the first few weeks n mths back from hospital, and yah man must think abt germs pple might bring!!!
 
Spiffy
Go according to your maternal instinct lor..dun be pressurized by what pple expect of you.. I v pai kuan..the more pple want me to do this, i purposely dun do...i dun like to be pressured into doing things..I rather relatives be angry with me than anything happen to my boys..relatives at most will say 'so cute.." or 'so poor thing bbs sick ah"..then they smack smack backside and go home...the real shit, we have to clear lor...sorry lor..whenever i think of this, i dun care what other pple think liao. But if ur kids' temperament ok, i think its fun to be out there with frens and relatives...
 
Spiffy , I think most of us may not have held the bb manyue as they were prob still too small, compared to a full term bb. Also , a handful of us had prem bbs so by time they r discharge , they are either hitting a mth or over a mth already ( that was for me ).

As what imakeitraib Mil said , it's pan tang to hold their manyue after 1 mth , something like we adults , dun celebrate after our birthday passes either . Thus I never celebrate lor ...

But more really , I was afraid pple want to carry them , go close close (accidentally cough how ? Keke ) and stuff like that . After all , at one mth , my bbs were just 2 kg at that time . So small ....

Thus celebrate a big one at 1 yr old lor !!!! By that time , our bbs already stronger n bigger. Also the bbs can also shake their head and look away when strangers wan to carry them . Like that not I dun allow pple to carry ma , I can put it down as their 12 mth old milestone - stranger anxiety !!! Ke ke !!!
 
Sophia and 76, is it possible to pm me where you bought the cam? I want to install one and see what my maid does every morning before we wake up.

,
 
76
yup pple seem to think tt twins are exhibits like that..ask me to bring here bring there. To me is huh I bring my babies out is how marfun u know or nt! Pple jus see n say wah twins ah blablah that's it then cry tt time all run away. I snap esp when my baby cry then stupid pple come n ask me 'eh why he cry until like tt?' to me it's like er if I know he won't be crying right? It's already chaotic enough when twins cry still wanna voice yr opinions for wat.
 
Can get the cameras from Sim Lim. There's many different types. Also can get from Home Fix it shops. I fixed the real ones in my babies room and the hall. The dummies are in my room, study and upstairs room.

imakeitrain: I agree, bring out both can be very marfun esp when they are fussy. People just stare at you like you are a bad parent. We are like animals in the zoo, for people to see and point. Sometimes, want to tell them to pay money coz go to the real zoo also not free deh.
 
Poko and all-
actually my hubby's not so keen to have a manyue cos kkh told us not to bring them to crowded places even church for 6 mths..but every other day someone will pester us so we caved.
76- yeah must learn not to give in to pressure!
And it's true, twins are like a novelty to others...so everyone wants to see. They don't realize the logistics of bringing them out esp when so young.

Ps why do ppl like to kiss bb's hands? It drives me nuts. Don't they realise bbs put their hands in their mouths?? One yr old can still wear mittens?

I didn't know it's considered pantang to celebrate after the fact. Anyone know why?
 
Spiffy,
read that u r also giving ebm. Same here, at beginning gals were so sleepy v hard to latch n when they do suckle they get so tired n drink v little. So I've resorted to expressing. After 2 weeks they totally rejecting my breAst Liao. Haiz.

How do u cope w night feeds ? Do u express? My cl still ard so she feeds the gals so I jus wake to express.but once she goes I dunno how to hAndle feeding n expressing.. V stress....
 
BBQ
bought mine at Sim Lim too.. Its called TP Link brand. Abt $150 per camera. You can always talk to the shop owners and tell them what you need and ask what are the types avail.My hubby said wana install motion detector...siao rgt..not as if my house got gold bars...he watch too much 007 movies..in the end, i say no..if he got extra $$, let me buy more branded bags..wahahahhaa
Sophia
Do you tell your maid abt the existence of the cameras? Do the real and fake ones look the same?Wats her reaction when you tell her? Mine like quite cool leh... no reaction..not scared leh..maybe she pretend...but actually already wayanging.
 
Sophia , and all who has taken their bb out b4,
Yes , even for me , (I pretty often go everywhere wif my bbs ) , find it a challenge to get them all prepared for an outing . And the number of bags ( 2) it involves, and the stuff we take when we go Kai Kai . I had lots of pple said it looks like I gg for a 3 days 2 bites hol wif all the bags !! Haha

also when bring them out , we always face questions from the curious public . Funny questions like :
1. How u get twins ah ??
2. Those who really straightforward one , will ask " is it natural one or not ??"
3. Got run in the family is it ?
4. Who's older twin ?
5. May I know how to get boy/ gal twin ??
6 . They not twins right ? One boy and 1 girl ma, not twins right ? Hmmmm...
And the most recent funniest question over the weekend:
Your twins is it got a few mths age diff ?? Because I bigger , 1 smaller ma. ( my boy is smaller).
I feel like answering yes , I took out one earlier , and gave birth to the other one later !!! Haha...
 
My maid quite gong gong. The real and fake ones do have some differences but becoz out high up on the ceiling, cant tell. Actually I dun have the time in school to check on her. But sometimes I come back early to spot check on her. I tell her tat I can see what she was doing. Bluff her actually.
No matter what, I never tell her my schedule so she cannot tell what time I will be late or early.
 
Hey MomMe, nice to see you here too. I'm winding down ebm operations soon.. the expressing every 3 hours is taking its toll on me. Right now my hubby feeds the boys thru the night while i express - it's not ideal because we should take one twin each and shorten the time. Plus he needs to work.. The expressing just takes up so much time. How old are your twins? Are they less sleepy now?

Poko, the questions are so true. Do you know i had a car showroom girl ask me point blank if my twins were natural? Whose business is it anyway, hmm?

Actually regarding the question about one bigger and one smaller, there is a picture of triplets outside the NICU in KKH where 1 of them has a different date of birth with the other 2. So it is possible..
 
Spiffy , yes - i heard that can be possible for twins to be born separately. But nomally within a few days range though...

Just that the question by the curious ah soh last sat , was like asking me if they had a few mths diff b/w themselves... WakakhahA.... Next time , I must really say , yes they are 6 mths in age diff . Want to see their jaw dropppp !!!

Yes , the most commonly question pple ask is if it is natural or not . And really , this is the strangest question cos natural or assisted conception is all done wif love b/w a couple . So it's natural ma , wif a little "gift" from hubby , and "gift" from Wifey whether got "help" or not, ta dah - our bbs !!! So it's a natural thing rite ???
 
Poko
to answer your qns from member of public:
1)I get twins by doing the deed facing the moon
2) Yes, natural...organic even..
3) Yah, my father, mum, uncle, aunties al twins..
4) This one must answer honestly
5) How to get boy/girl twin? mix spicy, bitter, sweet food into your dinner...and do #1 on the same night
6) Yah, not twins..just happ they look likke twins.
as for your most recent qn, yes, agree wth spiffy its possiblle to take out 1 earlier...then above all, tell them, if they wana know any of the above ans, please pay $100 per qn...before you will open your mouth. When you answer as per above, guarantee they will think you siao even after teh 1st qn..and wun ask further.
 
76, u really tickle me on a blue sleepy Monday morn !!!!!! Ke ke!!

Ok , tonite I try the deed facing the moon . Must be full moon or not ??? Sounds like a hot deed man !!!Ok , will see the result in 9 mths time !!
 
Poko
the angle of the arc the moon also impt lah... abt 40degree facing North of your house..Yes, and please emphasize your whole family all are twins themselves now coz they fight for the hot spot in the house to face the moon when doing the deed.
 
U sound as if we are werewolfs hor ... Ahwooooo !!!!!
Pls , pls , find for govt , share wif them yr proven exp in getting twins (facing the moon ) and voilà , our bb polution will increase . They may reward u wif extended leave , and also monetary reward . Must emphasize to govt, yrs is drug free , no need plan for timing one , no need eat special food . just telepathy b/w moon and u ....

Ah .... I see, now I know how yr bbs are made ..... Can rent out yr room to those who want twins !!! Good home business !!!! Hotel 76 !!!!?? Wakkaaaaaaa !!!!!!
 
Poko and 76 -- The 2 of you dam*n funny hahahah. Almost burst out laughing reading your Q&As.

I also get asked "Are they twins??" all the time. Like DUH. And worse still, when I tell them it is one boy one girl, they will ask "Which one is the boy and girl?" And it is VERY OBVIOUS who is who cos I always dress my grl in girly colours like pink and my boy in blue (I know very gender bias and boring!).
 
Chameleon , Monday blues ma ... So must lift up everyone spirit by crude jokes lor !!!

I get these questions every other week I take them out . And yes , pple also ask me which one boy , which one gal .. Obviously , the colours I dress them in ( gal in pinky or pastel colours or dresses , can tell she is girl rite ?? Duh ???

Anyway , after they finish their questions , they will whisper b/w themselves ..... " boy look like daddy , girl like mummy ", or " boy looks like gor gor " or some other funny conclusion. This happens alot inside the lift , or waiting in line ....
 
i started laughing in my cubicle at work, my colleague thot i siao. seems like being mommy to twins, we get these annoying questions all the time.
Poko
the rudest one somebody said to me, huh yr kids? wah dun look like you AT ALL hor.
*stares at person* err. ok. thanks ah.
another one.
twins ah? eh how come dun look alike? sure identical or not? or yr doc tell u wrongly?
*stares in wonder* HUH, like that also can??

hotel 76..haha i like that!
 
imakeitrain
My boys also dun look alike leh..tho supposedly to be identical. one look like me and the other looks like hubby...
Poko and Chameleon
As to handle pple who dunno their gender, maybe can consider drawing their anatomy on their clothes at the strategic spot. Then no qn asked..Anyway, i also kenna asked if my younger son girl or boy...so, not surprised at those toot lah..
Poko
How you know i did my deed in my bedroom? My bedroom not facing north la..hahahahahwhahaha...think i shld rent out my kitchen instead..wahhahahahaha..get the hint?
 
Spiffy
They are exactly 2 weeks today... hmmm... not so sleepy yet tho they still doze off halfway thru feeds sometimes.

Ya expressing is real tiring.. haiz.. I dunno if my hub can manage them when the CL goes coz their feeding timing almost the same. :p

dunno how long I can tahan after the CL leave...:p
 
Momme
Maybe you wana try the last week of Confinement by trying it out with hubby and yourself for feeding etc.. and CL helps when necc..then you will be able to tell wch area is lacking...coz nothing beats testing it out..and with someone by the side advising..btw, you got maid or relatievs to help you after CL leaves?
 
76,

Oh, u wear those bare back checked apron wif a pastry hat, holding a bread whisker, in the kitchen??? didn't know u like this kind of things ... U need new " kitchen " appliances for future deeds??? I have brand new in box clay mould. Can make clay vase like Demi Moore in " ghost ".

I would love to be yr opposite block neighbour !!!

Oh oh ... Getting x rated !!!
 
MomME , ok , back to serious topic ...keke..

Maybe u can do hands on now , bathing the bbs , or nite feeding them , just to have the on job feeling ?

I always doze off while nite feeding my bbs too ...
Expressing is not easy , especially must do so many times a day , and still sterilise all the parts used .

You will initially feel demoralized as the tiredness n monotonous feelings sets in ( during pumping ), but as time goes by , it will get easier , yr timing will work ard the feeds and the milk more established. Best of luck , n hang in there !
 
Imakeitrain,
Next time pple say yr twins not identical, then tell them in a whisper " yes, one of the bb looks like my husband, the other looks like my "ex boyfriend "(yr ex bf is yr hubb ma, but dun tell them la!!! Keke ... Silly questions , silly answers for those who Kay poh pple who ask us.

Hope u didn't fall off yr chair while reading the naughty posts !!! Notti 76 !!!
 
okok, dun say liao..wait i kenna sued...anyway, tdy my first day of study...wish me luck...going study later in the evening...and i am trying to drive there..need lots of luck..1st time driving after such a long break.
 


76
got a maid to help. But also have a 2 yr old who's a handful.
Ya my cl say this week I cont to rest next week take over. Think she can c I q worried coz she keep reassuring me the gals r v manageable. :p

ya v v Xian to pump. But seeing how long it takes for the gals to latch it may prob take longer to bf direct.
 
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