Place to 'complain' about your other half

Moorspa.

i also agreed with what u voiced out in your posting. I also informed my family as well as the in law too regarding my husband's wrongdoing especially his affair. Worse, he stayed with the other woman n her family including her mum and uncle and brother together for the past 6 months. Of cos he did bring my son over to stay overnight every sat till monday mrg then he will drop him at school. Of cos this was very hurting and i also understand taht he did left her place finally in last nov but i still refused to accept him back wholeheartedly. Although he did came back to my side, i felt everything is not the same anymore. I will always remind him even in front of the child of how his betrayal still haunting me.. I am not letting him get away scot-free.. i always tell him that i will remember this betrayal till the anger and hurt are truly gone from my life then only will i be able to move on with him. Right now he almost always with me and son. at times son not with me as he goes back to stay with grandparents. After he goes back to hotel, i always uncertain and suspicious of him asking the other woman to go over n meet him outside or not..... we are not living together. i dun feel very secured or assured that he will be a good husband.
 


MFF,

It is perfectly normal to hv many kinds of emotions after the husband's betrayal. I do go through hurt, anger, sadness etc, only pple who hv gone through e same experience will understand. As time goes by, you will learn to control yr emotions. My ex colleague told me that I had to control the negative emotions, it does come back once in a while but I do not let it affect me too much now. When I am down, I really feel very down for e whole day.

It is fine to feel down but do not let it become chronic cos it'll affect e quality of yr life. I hv complained and grieved but after sometime it serves no purpose in getting things improved. I am not sure whether anyone here believed in karma but I do. The pple who hurts us get their punishment in other forms. I hv already started to see it.

Taitai,

You may blame god, but god has never meant for anyone to be hurt. It is humans who disrespect each other, it is humans who are selfish. It is yr husband who betrayed you not god. God helps those who help themselves. As with the evolution of advanced technology like Internet and handphones with so many online applications now, it has made it easier for men and women to cheat in the marriage. Don't forget things are not as simple as before in the past, pple are not as giving and think for themselves more even as parents. I feel commercialism has a big part to play in what is happening now. Everything is abt making money to survive and living a luxurious life. Gone are the days when our ancestors work hard for a living, do they hv the time to cheat on their spouses? Only the rich does that. You can blame god and hate being a woman but it will not change yr circumstances if you do nothing abt it.
 
moorspa..

yes i do believe in karma.. in fact i am also seeing that my husband karma is at work now. i m very frustrated but glad.

this coming cny i and my boy will visit my in laws without the husband. his family dun wish for the son(my husband) to visit them or hv reunion dinner with them. He felt very sad n abit disappointed that his own family went ahead with the reunion dinner without asking him along.
 
Tweety35,

Betrayal of a spouse will remain in our memories forever, as a form of protection against being hurt again. Things are not e same for me either cos I see my husband in a different light now. The trust is totally broken and only the perpetrator can fix it. If he makes no effort to build up the trust and makes the wife feel valued again, the wife cannot never trust him.

I feel the same as you do even though I am more positive than before. I can't bring myself to forgive him cos he did nothing to make me feel valued and heal my hurt. You don't hv to forgive him if u don't want to, only when yr heart is ready to. My friend who is single do not understand n tells me that forgiveness does not need a reason. I disagree with her cos she is not in my position. I hv also ask myself why I feel this way, as usual I search in the Internet and found the answer. Just like when you are hurt by someone, the person has to apologize and it makes u feel better. In e case of betrayal in marriage, it is more than an apology to make the victim feel better. Broken trust and emotional trauma is involved, actions need to be taken by the perpetrator and he/she need to change himself/herself. If you search on forums on betrayal in marriage, there are many of them who are hurt and their spouses do not do much to heal their pain, that's when you choose to leave or stay. It is easier to leave w/o kids, like many others I stayed for e sake of my kids. You are not alone. It is definitely not pleasant to be in a loveless or meaningless marriage, but I am making this decision due to circumstances.
 
Tai Tai, I guess I am on this thread because despite it all, I still regard him as my "other half". For better or for worse. I revolted in a sense, but not necessarily in a way that is good - I decided to stop working. For me to focus on the family and on him, and not look too tired and haggard in the process, something's gotta give. I still want things to work out, and sometimes, this makes me feel like I am pathetic which irks me.

Moorspa, I completely agree with you. Only the perpetrator can fix it. Yes, even if there were things going wrong with the marriage, of all the choices to make, the perpetrator chose to cheat. But being in this position of being cheated on, I want to trust him again, but he's got to win that trust again. He's been pampering me lately, but he was slow to completely cut her out of his life. The wounds are still fresh because I found out only last month. And he repented - or showed signs of repent - only after I found out. He was fast to apologise and treat me better. But slow to cut contact, and only with suggestions on my part. It takes, as you say, more than an apology. The inertia against trusting him again is like a reflex action!! My single friend was puzzled about why I think he should delete the contact details of that other person. His not doing so was eating into me, made me wonder why he was keeping her contact details. Doesn't make me feel secure, doesn't help me believe that he means what he says.

Anyway, technology makes it easier to cheat. It also makes it easier to be found out. Technology betrayed him. That's how I found out. Tai Tai, the hand of God or some divine being was at work too, because it was a hitch in technology which repeated itself, that revealed the matter to me. I am not a religious person, but that really got me thinking.... .... ....Somebody or something loves me and is looking out for me after all....

You know tweety35, when I read that your inlaws, i feel that there is at least that bit of fairness.
 
I married 8 year hv 2 kids , 1 boy and 1 girl

Recently, just come out work after rest home 2 year still managed to get a job i'm lucky! dont know can last how long, never upgrade or future study

He changed2 another person(real him may b?) after we hv kids, use violent way to solve problem instead think better solution to communicate, sad!

I just a useless mother/ wife for him, he rather hired a maid listen to in law. since they get involved kids and finance very difficult! alot conflict on those expense, everything he spend costly n never think work with me as family ....let me felt he want kids dun want me

Just hope get better solution as the kids so small ..everything he want to take control and stay relationship with his old girl friends so i let him do what ever he like cos he unhappy he said ...

how about kids? hope can stay with them until grow up but i will hv difficult life if not listen, obey as he promised.....
 
MFF

i do agree that with the technology at present, i also found out long ago abt my hubby's intention n got very suspicious of him till it was confirmed thru other means.

since then i decided not to trust him wholely anymore, and for my son sake, i have to "act" sweet but the trust and feelings are gone/almost gone respectively after this betrayal. I must admit.

moorspa, i can understand what you were trying to tell me to be more positive but in fact, it is more easy to talk but more harder to walk the talk, if u get what i meant. what is truly forgiveness and forget? The only way is either divorce n can let go of everything or be off dead. The dead cannot bring everything like memories and wealth to their grave.

As for the loveless/meaingless marriage, i DID experience this loveless/meaningless marriage for several years starting from 2009 till now. Probably i did not realise that time i was struggling with finance woes, he abandoned me at the crucial time when i was trying to settle debts which he threw onto me, he chose to play outside with my friend n then got into paid sex that turned into affair with her. Now things are more settled more or less, and i found out too. No way period will i ever forgive him again for betraying me. I WILL NEVER FORGIVE HIM TRULY FOR HE IS A TRULY BLOODY BASTARD. If not for my son needed me being ard for him, i will walk out quietly n file n close the chapter. Can forget one cos in fact despites being married for 8yrs, i dun hv much true happiness and short sweet memories with him. as for the courtship, not really much as i knew him too shortly for 3mths only n got shotgun. my son is 8.
 
I also cannot help but to feel that the man is a mother-f*****, bastard. Sometimes, I can even curse in front of his mother's tomb that why on earth she brought up such a bastard.

Oh well, that's a sort of venting of frustration from me. And I felt, no lor, these SOBs will not change. It's us that we have to change, just like what moorspa said.

But I believe there should still be an avenue for us to curse and swear at these SOBs, and perhaps this may be the right place.

And I would like to suggest, that besides complaining, cursing and swearing at the god-danmned men, we should also update one another about our personal development on a daily basis (if you have the time, weekly etc etc etc). Be it good or bad, and encourage one another.

What do you ladies think?
 
oh no ..i'm not cursing i believe in purnishment he n his family think i should get purnishment cant adapt his method of taking care the kids etc

i felt discouraged at this time ...he no love at all cos his heart not with me anymore
 
Helpless mum, be patient. At first i did not believe in karma till it really happened to my hubby. He did get his karma on several times. I am not rejoicing yet.

dun feel so discouraged or defeated everytime. just do your job as a mum and what matters the most is your kids will appreciate your efforts in due time. dun care abt how his family thinks or watever. u were not born by his mum so dun bother la.
 
Hi i need some advice. i got no1 to talk to.now i am 8 month preg,my hubby will always fetch me after work,but onces he reach home he will just do his thing etc play game.whenever i tell he things he will just forget the next monment,he nv listen to what i said.just basically play game and went he his tired he will just go to sleep.i did tell him can he just talk to me or show some concern about me,but till now nothing have been done.
 
All of us here are trying to be a good mother to stay on for our children, dont deserve those man who are not fit to be father and husband, they are not ready to sacrifice.
 
Piglet, it may be starting. Before it got worse, tell him he can play now but once baby cones along, he may need to stop and help out. See what he say. That reminds me,I hate it when husband or children play games during meal time. I said to my husband if he like to play games then no point eating together. It means nothing to talk or it is so boring to eat with one another. If eating with friends, we chat we laugh we enjoy
 
Helpless, you mean the kids are picking the bad ways? That is so so sad. Please... Talk to the kids. I always feel for kids as we are really the one who will mould them
 
Tweety35,

I hv mentioned it is not easy to be positive in an unhappy situation. I hv been there and done that but after sometime I felt I deserved better. I shld treat myself better cos I hv been putting him n the marriage before me. It takes time to become positive, like I said it took 2.5 yrs for me. Even when my friend told me that I need to to be positive and be able to control my emotions, I felt it was impossible just like you. Now I fully understood what she meant, as I told myself that this year is going to be a better year than 2012. It is only difficult when you tell yrself it is difficult, and it was myself who wanted the marriage to work out but he can't be bothered with it.

I keep holding on to the fact that things need to be improved cos I want a happy ending. I felt unhappy cos it didn't turn out e way I wanted to. I slowly conditioned myself to the current situation, that I focus on myself and my kids. The marriage means nothing to me now, when I let go all my expectations of e marriage, I felt happier. It takes time to become positive, you need to fall to the bottom and realize that you just need to do ur best and be responsible for yrself. If not for my kids, I would hv divorced long ago.
 
Piglet woman,

It seems that yr husband has taken you for granted. Are you very nice to him even when you are not happy with him? I had similar experience when I had my first pregnancy. From what i hv learnt from last experience, men need to be taught a lesson.

Hv you shown yr anger to him when he disregards you? You can either ignore him and not talk to him when you are not happy with him, or choose to stay over at yr mum's place til he realizes what he has done wrong(a bit extreme but you can try out any solutions u can think of). I feel women cannot treat their men too well, men just disregard the wives. Sometimes a little tantrum works, but I do not know how to do that during my pregnancy time. I was neglected too but I don't know how to get my words through my husband. To get yr husband to listen to you, actions speak louder than words.
 
Helpless mum,

Is yr husband violent to you? Does he show violence in front of the kids? If he does, he'll influence the children. You need to make a stand and not be afraid of him. From yr description, he is very dominant and thinks he is always right. Is he stubborn as well? It is not healthy if yr kids do not respect you as well. It only shows that he has no respect for you. Do you know if he has any insecurities? Normally, such a person behave this way when they hv suffered emotional hurt but put up a hard front so that pple can't see his weakness. I know this through my emotional trauma from the betrayal of my husband and unfair treatment from my family.

I learnt abt my dad's history and realized he is actually very insecure n full of resentment. I felt it through one of my emotional release, it just came to me n I felt his pain. However, he is very negative n has put me down for yrs til now. He brought his negativity to his own wife n kids, and I can tell u that I feel it has ruin my life cos I hv low self esteem. I will not let this happen to my kids cos it will stop at my generation. My kids are so much happier than I was as a kid. Be strong, n fight for what is right. Do seek help in yr family if they can help you out. Never suffer in silence.

Taitai,

I am not qualified to counsel anyone but to share my experiences and what I hv learnt here. I came to realize that I can only help myself even when others tried to help me. Even if pple go for counseling, counsellors may make things better or worse. It is still all up to oneself to solve his/her problems. You can take in others' advices and work out the best solution for yrself.
 
yes, he did that's why my boy no confident with me and closed to daddy since he was borned. i know he trying his best not to do that but difficult control temper as he no longer love me and no more patient ..

you are right, he dun love me dun love the kids even he buy alot of toy spend his time with them

very negative ! my parent has passed away nobody help / teach on taking care of 2 kids except his family so always need to learn and adapt him or else leave 2 kids for his family

i cant bear to leave them too
 
Helpless mum, I am alarmed to read that your husband uses violence. Are you in danger of physical harm? Should you get a Police Protection Order?
 
Tweety, he is with you and your son most of the time now, and has left - or at least appears to have left - that woman? May I ask what your stance on it is? Because you mentioned that he goes back to the hotel. You're not staying together? My husband is now focusing a lot of his time and energy on us - he's always been actually, and now even more so, and treating me with great thoughtfulness. I don't know what position to take on this. Is he being genuine? Is he doing all this so as to better hide continuing misdeeds, or to mask a guilty conscience, or out of convenience because of our child, or he wants my help with certain things?
Generally, I take the view that since I want this marriage, and he is demonstrating all this effort, I can take it as a good sign and feel unfettered about making up with him too. But it feels like two steps forward, three steps back, because the suspicions and lack of trust in him just eats into me.

Moorspa, I think you are very strong.
 
MFF, yes we are not staying together despites he made efforts to spend time with us daily after work and on weekends i drive over to his side. he is currently homeless n staying at hostels since then. My mum takes me and son in but not my husband due to past terrors he did to me and my family were horrified to know that i suffered quite a lot of stresses due to his illegal debts last time.

so as far as i noticed, he is focusing on me and son alot nowadays. he knew i do and still hv the thought of leaving him for good and he is not gonna let it happen. he wants me to endure n stay with him n give chances to make up for the lost time with me.

But it feels like two steps forward, three steps back, because the suspicions and lack of trust in him just eats into me. =_= this is what i m experiencing n feeling right now.
 
yes he warning must listen or else get nothing and will not pay single cents

he started protect his welfare and

he think he rich i want his $ , faint!

many time i wanted to get PPO but think of kids i stop

my boy love him much

he said i'm family destroyer felt hurt!
I have to b strong no choice, wait and see ..
 
honestly.. i m still lost to what to do and i felt trapped btw my wanting a divorce n seeing him putting in efforts to focus on us, but in my heart, i really do love him.
 
Same.., i'm lost dont have any plan without him

he in relationship and hold this family keep telling lie to me

no more trust!
 
Moorspa thank

I come from broken family .. that's why more stressful to handle 2 kids, every parent want the best for kids but difficult when we 2 different and everything must follow his way and i felt unhappy he felt discourage too

try understand and change or else difficult
 
It's heartwrenching to read your stories, but yes, moms. You all are strong ladies.

Just focus on your kids, and raise them well. If you have already tried to rekindle the passion, but your husbands abuse it, then just let him be.

One day, he will regret and really treasure you for making his home a heaven on Earth.
 
Tweety, is there any worth in giving him a bit more benefit of doubt? He denied that what she said was true. Even if his denial is not totally true, there might be some truth in it. After all, can her words be trusted? I am not trying to influence your decision. Its just that I know of a case very similar to yours, and I know it from the angle of the other woman (not directly, it was my friend who told me about it). And the woman.... is so selfish and manipulative. Has me wondering if its true about her pregnancy and if he led her to ask her husband for divorce etc. Or was she saying these things to wreck your relationship even more? I just can't trust anyone who would betray their close friend - and esp one who is married with a child - like that.
 
hubby no longer love and stand with me after we hv kids...hurt everytime when kids no respect, talk loud, talk rude not listen

I want them watch 'barney' hubby want them to watch 'power ranger'


many things we argue we fight ..
 
MFF, are u referring to my hubby's affair or your friend's case? if mine, that was what she claimed that her baby's father was my hubby, again no proof. Of cos i was very sad n shocked. of cos she finally aborted it last dec.

nope, it was her ex hubby who decided to divorce her due to her affair with my hubby last year. her divorce was finalised this month as waht i knew from her. guess she really wanted my hubby cos of two reasons,-wanted his money and she loved him. she had expected to live together with him n grow old tog after he told her he signed the separation paper.. however it was just purely a lie to mislead her from the start of last year. Fyi, she has a long history of getting involved with married men and sleeping ard behind her ex hubby back n later behind my hubby back. till last 2 years ago when she n my hubby had started talking abt be together, she claimed to have stopped playing alot and decided to be faithful to my hubby, my hubby said he changed mind gradually n decided he no longer wanted to be with her anymore but still carried on the on-goin affair till last nov year he decided to walk out on her. in summary, he claimed he could not see any future with the other woman after he woke up at the end of 2011.
 
The part where I asked whether the pregnancy and him leading her on to the extent that she wanted to divorce her husband, I was referring to your hubby's. I don't know if my friend's case developed further to the point that the woman got pregnant or claimed pregnancy. The first and last I heard about it was early last year. The guy had gone back to his wife, he and his wife decided to work things out. But this woman didn't want to let go and believed that the guy owes her an explanation, that the situation was unfair to her, and she still didn't want to let go. This woman is also married with one or two kids. Deluded. She actually thought she was in the right, and had done no wrong.

This woman who was in your hubby's life. Her history shows that she can't be trusted. I wouldn't put much faith in her words, really. Whether she is deluded or deceitful, I wouldn't trust her.
 
I don't know if my friend's case developed further to the point that the woman got pregnant or claimed pregnancy. The first and last I heard about it was early last year. The guy had gone back to his wife, he and his wife decided to work things out. But this woman didn't want to let go and believed that the guy owes her an explanation, that the situation was unfair to her, and she still didn't want to let go. This woman is also married with one or two kids. Deluded. She actually thought she was in the right, and had done no wrong.

this woman is your friend's case or mine this time?
 
This is my friend's case.
Sorry, I've been confusing.
Let me see if I can explain better. I am cynical about what your hubby's other woman said because of this woman in my friend's case. And both cases are similar.

In my friend's case. Two couples. The wives of both couples are also quite close friends. Then one woman from one couple and a guy from the other couple got together. Both couples have kids. The wife found out, the guy decided to go back to his wife, and they decided to work things out. The woman on the other hand, felt that this was unfair to her, the guy owed her, and she wanted him back. At that point when I heard about it, she still wanted him back. But I never wanted to know any more about it. I think she is selfish and manipulative, and deluded.

And so I wonder if the woman who was in your husband's life has the same attitude.
In any case, I wouldn't trust either of them - the woman in my friend's case, and the woman who was in your husband's life.
 
Oh dear..

similarity!!!! my case here is that the other woman is married (twice and kids from her first marriage and none from 2nd marriage) and i was friends with her for a long time. As for my hubby, at first he did not know her personally nor not even friends with her yet till the other woman got curious n asked me to bring my then bf, now hubby along for introduction. on the day i intro my hubby to her, she intentionally dressed up nicely and sexy just to get attention. I did knew back then that she did get involved with other few guys whom i knew but not bothered abt it as it was her own life.

well, the friend said she had done nothing wrong and that my hubby approached her firstly. also urged me to divorce my hubby too (to be fair as she also got divorced from her 2nd hubby). my hubby finally admitted he was in the wrong and regretted. yes karma hitting him several times and he could not take it anymore so decided to stop and end with her and wanted to come back to my side as he still loves me and son. All he wanted is a family and he needs his family together. the friend knew his weakness -need for own family- tried to get him to leave me n she could offer him what i already gave him-a son and family. on her hand, she only wanted him to support her and her two kids from her first marriage. in exchange of offer him a family that he needs badly in his life. this is something that he dun think he wants. all he wants was me and son to grow as a family together with him. perhaps he might have told her that he wishes for a daughter. so she could try hard to fulfill his wish in hope that he can stay together with her n support her.
 
Yes yes i did knew that she is manipulative too. like her 2nd hubby, she also snatched him from her ex bestie too. claimed that there was nothing wrong in wanting him(2nd ex hubby) for herself and later on she offered him marriage in exchange of the flat ownership and to help support her two own kids.

And i also knew for a long time that she could go bed with guys easily. just that i never expected her to repeat history and snatched my hubby like that.

How i know all this is i used to hang out alot with her and her ex hubby before for quite few years till i met my hubby then stopped hanging out with her since then.
 
ya, right,your husband approached her first - at gunpoint?? at knifepoint? she could have rejected him, and bearing in mind that she was your friend, that was the right thing for her to do.

she just can't be trusted. she betrays her closest friends, cheats on her husband/s, cheats on her lovers (what a web of deceit she spins). i really think her words can't be trusted. maybe there's some truth in what she says, maybe the facts are twisted, maybe its lies woven into facts etc. who knows? maybe she will just stop at nothing to get her way, and what she told you was aimed at wrecking your relationship with you husband even more?far from saying that you hb is innocent, but really, can't nail him based on her words at all. its already difficult enough trying to deal with the situation, without adding her words to the mix.

My heart goes out to you. My heart also went out to the wife in my friend's case.
 
Helpless mum, you don't want them to watch Power Rangers... because... it promotes violence, or something? (sorry, i don't know Barney, nor do I know Power Rangers) I was thinking, maybe don't sweat the small stuff but it occurs to me also that you may have more fundamental reasons for objecting to Power Rangers.
 
Moorspa is spot on about not let feeling blue get chronic as it affects quality of life. I get insomnia over this, and the lack of sleep is affecting my ability to function
sad.gif
Not that I want to loose sleep over it. But things just gnaw at me and I can't sleep.
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yes... after she acted innocently n sweetly and he got tempted to go after her. then 1/3 battle won for her.. then she started talking big n proud to get his attention. then 2/3 battle won once he fell in love with her. 3/3 battle won finally after he moved in with her and "abandoned" me for almost a year. and then finally she revealed ugly side to him gradually and he got scared plus karma hit him. and now he surrendered n put up the white towel n wanted to come back to me while i was prepared to info my lawyer to initate the proceedings for me after cny this month. (my lawyer advised me to wait for a year to try work things out. if failed then need to obtain a report from my counsellor n initate the proceeding and he can help me tell judge that i dun need to go for the complusory counselling sessions as long as i hv the valid report from my counsellor.)
 
this friend is now more as a hi n bye friend, no longer close friend. she dun deserve any respect from me or common friends who knew what happened.
 
i'm upset! ..just came bck from work boy ignored me. everytime ask / talk to him he will answer 'i dun like mummy' This yr he going 4yr old everything listen / learn from his father
 
MFF
they always watch okto ..the power ranger japanese version, beyblade, and he always play the animal card bought from 7-eleven

dunno why i felt insecured ..trying to get closed with them but hubby blocked he said he always right and smarter then me ..shouldn't listen to me and i hv no rights

we brought alot barney CD ..2 kids also like it

no 1 perfect i felt sad ..if my son behave like him
 
Helpless mum,

Pls get a PPO like what MFF said, if not, when yr kids grow up and hv no respect for you, you will be in more heart pain. Yr husband is obviously taking advantage of you cos of yr family background. He think that you can't do without him, and he could sense yr fear. Pple bully those who has no confidence in themselves and has a lot of fear. You shld protect yr welfare first before you could protect yr kids from their father's poisonous words. It is obvious that he has been "poisoning" them abt how bad a mother you are, otherwise yr son would not reject you.

A kid just takes in what an adult tells them cos they do not hv the ability to differentiate what is right or wrong. You need to seek help before yr kids are totally brainwashed by yr husband. Yr husband is so wrong in what he is doing and he is doing you great injustice. Pls protect yrself when there is no one but yrself to depend on. If you give up on yrself, then I hv nothing to say. Do not leave things to fate, you can bring a change in yr life. Do what is right and do not let things be if you still want yr kids.

MFF,

I am lucky that I don't hv a violent husband. In my eyes, my father was a violent man as he throw things when he is angry, though he doesn't hit my mum but he verbally abused my mum. I was almost hit by him when I defended my mum against his verbal abuse. I also showed my husband no fear when he was frustrated with e way I treated him after his betrayal, he almost wanted to hit me and I told him to beat me to death cos I was so hurt that I wanted to die. I told him I am not afraid of death as it is a relief for me, and that was my heart felt words. He was stunned by my words, then he knew I wanted to die so badly n I was merely living for my kids.
 
Helpless mum,

You are not helpless as long you don't give up and willing to try all ways to get help. You can get PPO, or seek help from MP etc. Even if things may not go yr way, as long you don't give up, you can find help. Just keep on trying and don't give up, I really wish that yr kids will follow you cos their dad is a very bad influence on them. He is tainting a white paper.
 
I forced to give up may b 1 day i coudn't take it anymore, husband gang up whole family againts me as a wife / mother . cant met his expectation he want smart wife smart kids and he dunno what he did ..everything pushed blame on me ! i'm hurt never force him he said i forced him to listen to me ..(speechless)
how many time he tear my heart .....


In my life with this man full of challenge and no love at all in family

2 kids always follow his way ..

alot ppl asked me to apply PPO dun wait until real hit as he said many many time but i not brave enough to do that until now ..
 
how protect myself and my welfare when he threatening ..he will hurt me through the kids!
he name my girl same as his g/f name everytime remind me at home

house he dun want sell already .. because that women he lost control lost temper i hv noticed

sigh
 
Helpless mum,

It is yr life, it depends on how well you know yr husband. You are emotional now, and you need to go for counseling and see how they can help in yr situation. You can seek counseling in the Family service centre in yr area. Just google search it, and you can find it. It is either you live yr life in threats and fear or you get out of it. Yr husband definitely knows you better than you know him, he knows yr weakness thus the threats using the kids. He knows that you won't do anything against him as long he has the kids as his "weapon" as they mean a lot to you, to me I feel it is just an empty threat to control you cos yr kids are already in the process of being brainwashed by him. Best of luck to you.
 


thanks

I get attacked by own husband recently. married him 8yr of cos i know him very well n felt discouraged..,cant get any solution so far

he have another g/f .., all his friends support his idea

he make clear to everyone no longer love / talk to his wife in fb etc

he challenge to take action surrender kids or he take 1 of them (heartless)

same like my father, how he treated my mum and how my husband treated me now ...why i cant get rid of the shadow move on our living, all come with alot of condition(pressure) as the kid so small (he wont love them long if he plan together with another girl)

i never said i always rights but he too demanding and selfish!

he know he can take full advantage of me when i'm weak n drop into depression ..
 
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