(2013) ivf/icsi mummies Support group

Koirc, I wanted to go swimming too an I think I won't have stamina either haha.

Mofmm, slowly when you have time and gets to a routine? Now that baby is 4 months old, DH and me get used to her demands and cries so we aren't so flustered. Though still tiring but less stressful in a way. That's when I have time to go exercise and leave baby with DH haha.

Dian tang, you C sec also?
 


Hi Mummies, haven't been here in a while. Same here, been very busy with the little one. The only time to surf the net is on my phone while I'm pumping. Today is a little like my day off since DH is home. Woo hoo!

Hope everyone is doing fine and babies are behaving
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For me, my mastitis is completely gone now and both boobs feel soft. Managed to latch baby for 10-15 mins every day (yay!). My CL is leaving next Friday and I'm happy and sad about it. I'm happy for my boy because we will be able to give him more loving care (compared to CL) but I'm sad for myself because I'll be so tired!

To prepare, I've started doing part-time night duty for almost a week now. DH will look after baby from 9.30pm while I sleep. Then I wake up to pump at 12.30am, I will take over from 1am. At 4am, I will pass baby to CL, do my 4.30am pump and then sleep at 5am. So far so good.

Baby's evening cry is also improving. Now he cries until 9.30pm instead of 10.30pm. Ha ha! Small improvement but I'm over the moon!! Other than that, we are still waiting for baby to smile.

Koirc, when are you moving? Pack your house room by room and label the boxes by room and leave them there. At your new place, the movers will place the boxes in the specified room and you can straight away unpack from there. This is better and less overwhelming than unloading a whole pile of boxes from the living room. Hope this helps!

Regarding your question about feeding while baby lying down, we do that half the time although I read that it is not good as it will develop into a bad habit for baby. Don't think they will choke because they are not drinking per se but are sucking, which means they can control the flow of the milk. Usually we feed baby lying down when we already put him down to sleep and he fusses a little. Instead of picking him up again, we just give him the bottle and after a few suck, he will fall asleep immediately.

small bunny, soon soon! Very exciting. Enjoy your time with DH and sleep & rest as much as you can now! Because soon you will join us 'panda' mums and have very little time for sleep or anything else! Ha ha! But it's okay, all of us will tell you that baby is worth everything
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PSP, how are you? Are you feeling more settled into a routine?

Koirc and Dian tang, small world indeed! How nice that you know each other!
 
Hope enjoy ur time now cos once bb starts to eat solids, will be busier. Have to cook n then feed which is rather time consuming.
That's how my friend put it, it's getting more n more busier as bb grows older.

Lil good that bb can latch again. U r doing great now, guess when CL leaves, u can still be able to cope.

Did any ladies measure their waist lines aft birth? Me din. Used to be 26 bah now, should be 30+.
 
Lil: I left my bb to my CL to pat her to sleep. My bb has been crying v bad before sleep for e past 3 nights . Really don't know how to handle. She cried for 15 mins before my CL pat her to sleep. I was telling my CL not to carry her, just pat
her on e bed. I keep asking myself why my friends' babies all sleep so well and my bb is always crying.
 
Sade, thanks for the encouragement. Still a little worried about how to cope without because now I still have 3hrs sleep from 5am-8am every morning before I start the day. Without CL, it will be non-stop. I have asked my aunt and mum to drop by whenever they are free. I didn't specify time for them just whenever they are free. So I can take a breather when they are here. Good thing is that I selected a maid today and will start paperwork on Monday so hopefully in 3 weeks+ time, I will have a live-in help. Her duties will be mainly household though but it is still good to have extra pair of hands.

PSP, Don't worry about baby crying. As unnerving and exhausting as it is, I have learnt that it is very normal. I was like you. Why are other babies so happy and sleeping while all mine does is cry and won't sleep. My boy has been crying every evening since week 4 till now. So it has been 3 full weeks of evening crying from 7.30pm to 10.30pm. Only in the past 3 days, has he improved to crying until 9.30pm. I'm told it will get better by 3rd month. So I'm counting down the days. Every day, we are 1 day closer to better sleep
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Hopefully your baby will not be like mine and will sleep better soon. Most importantly, don't worry. It will be fine
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Hope: yes mine was c sect . So I can't start exercise now as it is only 9 weeks since my bb was born.how abt u?
Hope I have time for swimming .

Lil ponyo: it is really a small world . Hope u are coping well. My dh and I didnot have schedule but we c who is less tired to wake every night
 
lil its not easy to take care of bb who is always crying. think ur bb is suffering from colic. try to carry yr bb upright, might help to calm bb.
good to hv some help on n off so that u can hv some rest. in the meantime before ur maid is here, do rest whenever bb rest.
 
Lil: thanks for your encouragement. Sometimes I keep asking myself if I hv made e right choice to bring my bb to e world and if I can handle her. Sleepless night, baby crying, argument with my mum and hb, the labour pain, mentally and physically stress and etc...

Is not easy to hv her, especially for us who have gone thru e IVF process.
 
Psp, you are not alone.. Quite often I have the same thought as you.. Why did I choose this path where I have to stay home to look after 2 boys, take their non stop crying, fussiness, carrying patting, pumping, staying with the inlaw, house dirty and noisy.. I got a successful career earning decent amount, enjoying fine things in my life, go holiday anytime, etc.. Why why why I ended up in this stage.. Anyway, I guess we just need time to adjust to this new phrase of our life and enjoy our baby.. We are first time mum with no experience.. Soon we will be able to handle them easily! Jiayou!
 
Saralyn gynae didn't say anything abt jab to mature lungs. In short she's just making me wait til babies are 37 wks n 3 days old. Guess babies lungs will be mature by then.

Lil I'm not getting much rest now cos keep waking at night partly cos it's almost impossible to get comfortable. I'm lucky whenever I get 2 hrs before waking up mostly it's hrly... n often spend part of the night sleeping in sitting position. I find I sleep best between 7-9am but since I'm still working only get that on wkends. But yes I know it'll be tougher when babies are out. I'm so looking fwd to seeing their little faces!
 
PSP, yes you are definitely not alone. And remember your hormones are still all over the place at the moment and will take time to settle. This also includes adjustments in our relationship with family too.

I have asked myself the same question countless times too just like Saralyn. Sometimes on Friday nights and weekends, while I'm carrying my crying baby, I would catch myself looking out my window at those carefree people outside, all dressed up and having a good time. Ha ha! But when I see my baby sleeping like an angel, I would get all happy with emotion because I can't believe we finally have a beautiful baby of our own. HA ha! So it is a rollercoaster ride but it will get better as we get a better hang of it.

Sade, yeah, it's not easy when my baby seems to be crying every waking moment. Trying my best to rest while CL is still around but I find my heartbeat quicken every time baby cries. Hard to relax!

Small Bunny, it will be very exciting. I still remember the day I delivery very clearly. You will enjoy it! Jia you!
 
I also have the same feeling. Like suddenly lost my freedom n beauty sleep. My baby sleep pattern is like how I sleep during 3rd tri. Late night n wake up at wee hrs looking for me. Then sleep from 7am to 10am. N she also like to take afternoon nap. Hahaha.

But my heart melt when she smile at me or ans me back when I call her. So sweet
 
Agree. When I hold her tight in my arms, my heart melts too.
I guess is just a matter of time to adapt to my bb.

Babysmurf: did u receive my FB invitation?
 
Hi Saralyn, your post describes how I feel - I just want to get back to my job and talk to people whom I can reason with, not be faced with a wailing baby I can't seem to soothe! I'm tired of the pumping too - like how my social life is arranged around the pumping schedule and even now I can't sleep though I am tired, simply cos I am waiting for one more hour before I can pump and then sleep through till 6am. I have given up on the night pumping already and I am still tired.

Keep asking myself - what have I done? My jet setting life, all my hotel platinum memberships, Krisfkyer gold, ad hoc holidays, self indulgence shopping wise all are things of the past. And we are only just starting. Long journey ahead with the little ones and low chance of getting back the life I had before them till at least 5 years later?

Then I lie on the bed with one of them and she smiles and waves at me, or she Lies against my chest and I bury my face in her hair...and the sweetest most tender feeling comes over me, esp when I think of the journey we went through to bring our little ones here...and I can't imagine going back to the life I had before this, can't imagine missing a moment with them.

But I know my own temperament, not suited to stay home to take care 24/7. I don't mind the diaper changes or feeding or burping but the crying for no reason bit and trying to get them to sleep, I can't do it. I rather go back to work earn money and get a full time nanny while I play with them hehe.
 
I also missed the freedom and the overseas holiday . But seeing my bb when he smiled at me, I forget abt all these.
We all been thru a lot to have this bb . So enjoy the moment now !
 
Lil, my boys were like that, crying whenever they were awake. I think is like a passing phrase.. They are better now and got some awake time where they are calm and i can talk to them and they will respond with their own language or smile.. Soon you will get to see the happy moment of your boy!

Mofmm, yes.. Me too.. All my platinum status are gone.. Sigh.. I really missed working so much.. I used to hate my frequent flying but now how I wish I can fly. Haha..
 
hi mummies, do you have any confinement ladies which you can recommend? till now I've not been able to find. edd 2 jan 2014 but doc says might deliver in dec.
 
Saralyn, yes I really hope it is just a phase for my boy. Really can't wait for it to be over. Meanwhile, really REALLY eagerly waiting for him to smile at us.
 
Lil, we're still cleaning up the place and packing. So moving end month cos I can't find movers who can do it earlier. Unbelievable right? Everyone is moving house! Haha...

MofMM, I am with you! My KF Gold got revoked already.
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But I am not giving up my lifestyle. I think I am those who want my cake and eat it too. In fact I am going BKK tomorrow and back on Sat night. Just needed to go recharge before I go back to work next week. So I am really looking forward to the spa and shopping! :D
 
Lil, talk more to him!
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Koirc, nice!! Enjoy ya.. I don't know whether I can do that or not. Even going for my facial already has difficulties in finding people to look after my boys
 
Koirc, wow! That's amazing! Enjoy your vacation! Ooh I can just imagine the spa, massage and a good night sleep! That's heavenly!!! So who looks after your baby while you're away? I guess a lot of us got downgraded from KF Gold! Lol! All the best for your move. It's exciting, new house, new addition to family, new adventure
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Saralyn, okay okay will try talk more but it's kind of hard sometimes because the window of opportunity where he is awake and not crying is very small!
 
Koirc: wow, finally u can relax.. Shop, eat and massage. I miss e platinum mall and Thai massage... Enjoy urself

Saralyn: Same here. Even to take a nap peaceful has to depend on my bb's feeding time.
 
Thanks, ladies. It'll be a test on the separation anxiety level. :p

Saralyn, I understand cos I used to feel "trapped" when I couldn't go out. In fact I'm always on my toes when bb is around.
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Lil, my mum has been looking after my baby. We need to pack things for the move so the house is very messy. I've left bb there for a week already. Going to see him only in the evening. Need to get used to this arrangement since it's gonna be so when I return to work.
 
Koirc, it is really good that your mum is willing and able to help you look after baby. I wish I have that too. We have no choice but to send baby to infant care when I go back to work. It's always better to have family care for your baby. At least it gives you a peace of mind. So enjoy your holiday, recharge and come back refreshed
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Koirc, nice! Enjoy!

I doubt i can be like you. Just gg for a musical play and i kept checking my hp although i know my boy is in good hands w my parents. Hubby and mum know that i can never go on a trip w/o baby. Haiz....hw i wish i dun have to work for as long as baby needs my attention...
 
koirc enjoy your holidays! I miss my holidays too. n looking forward to bring my gal for holiday next yr.

lil yes talk more to ur bb boy. tell him to be good to mummy n dont cry so much. maybe sing a song to him. or tell him a story. he just like to listen to ur voice now. soon he will smile at u. n it will melt ur heart.

lets not forget that its not easy for us to have bb n now we r blessed with one bb or twins for some sisters here. some of the other sisters at the other forum r hoping to hv bb for many yrs n still no good news for them. we r those blissful ones who managed to conceive n hv kid now. its another chapter of our life n soon we will get use to it.
 
Sade, i agree with you. This baby is too precious to us. If i can choose again, i will still go thru all these despite the sleepless nights and all those crankiness. All these are irreversible. It will be gone before we know it.
 
Sade, well said. Thanks for the reminder
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I needed that reminder when I hit a low point with sleep deprivation and exhaustion. We are indeed very blessed to be here on this thread. I can still recall those dreaded 2ww and the disappointment everytime AF arrived. Our boy is so precious to us, we definitely won't trade it for anything.

Yes, talking and singing to my boy as much as possible whenever he is awake and not screaming. At the moment, he just stares at me blankly. Sometimes, he just looks right pass me (?). Really looking forward to a hint of smile from him. But you know, right now as long as he is healthy, I can't ask for anything more ;)
 
Ladies, can u tell me if is cheaper to bring bb to see doctor or injection at singhealth? Currently my bb is seeing a PD at Thomson Medical. Each visit costs me abt $130. Any idea if there is any injection package in TMC and Singhealth ?
 
Psp: singhealth, u mean polyclinic? Currently if u take 5in1 n hep b at polyclinic no charges for Singaporean. Usually is nurses do the jab for baby. Payment is option jab.
 
Alison_PSP: The 5-in-1 injection combines vaccines against Diphtheria/Pertussis/Tetanus (DPT), Polio and Haemophilus Influenzae type B (Hib) in 1 injection.

The first jab is at 3 months.
 
lil its indeed not easy to take care of a bb who is always crying. maybe u should do some colic tummy massage for ur bb and also apply ru yi oil on his tummy. I gave my girl rid wind few times when she was cranky. n she was beter aft taking it.

reikibaby u started working alrdy? I left my bb with my mum while my hb n me wen for midnight movie every fri. hehe. bb will be asleep at that hr so still ok. but I m just like u kept on checking hp. haha.
 
Sade, well said! Thanks for the reminder how precious is our baby.. I still remember I told my husband no matter what push present he gonna give me for no 3, I will not want! Haha.. Then after afew days seeing how cute and sweet are my boys except the crying I so feel like having a 3rd one! Haha. I enjoy having them sleeping in my arm or beside me on the bed..
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Psp, I used to go tmc for pd.. Recently I went to polyclinic to take the jab. Have not seen the doc for assessment so no comment on the doc part.. But the waiting time is long and the jabs are cheaper there.. But done by the nurse..
 
Sade, still looking for one...
What time is your girl's bedtime?

Saralyn, i will ler baby sleep. Only 1st month i will wake baby to drink milk. After that, now that baby is older, i will let him sleep and feed when he wakes. Unless you choose to dreamfeed.
 
Reiki and babysmurf, in this case, how long is their interval between each feed? I always wake them up for fee even when they are sleeping and past few days I got 2 screaming and crying non stop baby when feeding. So I think they are really tired and want to sleep but I forced them to wake up..

Also, if based on feed only when they want, their routine is gone? Coz you can't meet their bedtime right?
 
reikibaby my bb sleeps at 11plus sometimes 12plus. v late hor. no choice cos I also sleep late. what time does ur bb sleep?

saralyn tough question, well I guess its depends on individual bb weight bah. for my girl, her last feed is at 1045pm n then next feed is 6am. she dont cry for milk, I nurse as I hv to pump.if I woke up late at 8am then she will nurse at 8am. i always nurse her aka dreamfeed her. for me I m worried that she might be thirsty cos sleeping in air con room. so I always nurse her whenever I wake up to pump. as for aft nap, I will feed my girl not later than 4hrs.
 
psp u din washed ur hairs during confinement? how to stand it? I sprayed dry shampoo but I cant stand it n washed hair aft day 6. but not daily.
 
Sade, so you nurse one side and pump the other side?

I still trying to figure out why my boys scream and cry while feeding.. Initially I thought is colic coz is always at 7+pm.. But it happened again just now at 1pm!
 


Saralyn, getting a bb to sleep is such a difficult task, so I've never woken my boy up for a feed! I rather let him sleep...could it be your boys are not hungry? I found that my bb will scream if I try to feed him before he is really hungry.

Sade, that was a really good reminder that our babies are precious
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Bedtime of 11-plus does sound a bit late, on the other hand am I putting mine to bed too early? He goes to bed at 7pm, I will latch him around 645pm, and he wakes up around 3am for another feed. But that means I can have a social life and go out for dinner!

Lil, hang in there! The crying is really just a passing phase and things will get better soon. Maybe try talking to bb when you're feeding, bathing, or carrying him? When you see him smile at you your heart will melt
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