(2005/02) Feb/Mar 2005 Babies

folic,

Happy belated birthday to Princess YX
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pax,

S is also giving us a hard time. Its been a challenge not to beat him in fact and we still had not. He is quite rebellious also ... eg. yesterday he climbed up a table to try to switch on the light. My hb was beside him and warned him sternly not to, yet he still go ahead. Sigh This is just one of many many such incident that start happening recently. He used to be such a sweet boy. I din know 4 years old also get rebellious....
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hope M copes well in his new cc. S is still crying everyday and telling me either he dun wanna go to school or he wanna be a half day child. He dun like to stay full day (dunno why). My hb picked them up earliest at 6:15pm then come fetch me. If fetch me first or traffic jam, then can be as late as 6:50pm. long hours.
 


hi Pax,

C takes school bus home now. The school bus usually picks him up at 5:30 and he will reach home at 6:05. Full day CCC is not bad cos they have lots of activities in school and lots of frens. And when the kid reaches home, he will not be bored already from nothing to do...and grandma can also relax...and everybody in a happy/relaxed mood for the rest of the evening...
 
gd morning ladies

checking in here after my failed beautycrunch spree. sigh sigh sigh.

pax, wat's wrong with cc? ignatius started CC when he was 19mths (although i know a certain individual here started earlier!) and his 1 hr bus ride home alone at 19mths.
dun think shld convey to M that he's doing cc coz he's notti. i think that does quite significant damage to the young psyche. then it really seems like CC is a punitive establishment when it really should be a childCARE establishment where they can enjoy themselves as much as in kindy. it's kind of pre-sabotaging the teachers in the CC.

anyway i always do not advocate the "removal" method. yes M may not play nice with his sister right now, but if u remove him, then he will never get the chance to learn to play nice. yes it's hard on your mom to be around to give him the opportunity to let him learn to play WITH his sister or to supervise, and yes J suffers a bit, but in the long run, it may be better all round. sometimes i have to keep reminding myself in such situations that the pain is transient (a few months maybe?) but the good/bad effects is for a good many years (or even for life?).

but that's just my style which obviously is not a panacea for all. all situations are different and if you feel you've done what's best, then just execute with conviction and do try not to make M feel punished. whole day CC is a long time to feel punished. can you imagine 9 hours of punishment everyday?
 
poohy....

4 years old is quite rebellious. When I tell cayden not to touch certain things...he will still touch it and at the same time look at me. This kind of behaviour..I really cannot tahan....so scold and scold and scold...hahhaha...

Recently, he started saying this after I scolded him " You have to be nice to me oki. !"....that got him in even bigger trouble. So makes him stand in the corner (actually want him to face the wall...but lucky for him there is no wall).
 
phantom... ya tell me about rebellious!
luckily for ignatius he seldom drives both parents up the wall at the same time. so there is usually one party to keep the other party sane.

when he drives BOTH parents up the wall, it's usally TOO BAD for him and he gets corporal punishment. using ruler or locking in room until the screams and hitting of wall/door and throwing of toys die down and he says sorry very contritely.

i started out saying kids no need corporal punishment, but am now advocate of spare the rod and spoil the child. hahahaha like wat my boss says, with children is either bribery or fear. i choose fear.
 
phantom,

I really laugh when I read what you said about C. Exactly like S! I try the soft way of counseling (nagging) him and hard way of scolding him very sternly... and his skin had became soooooo thick, nothing can go in. Each day, I felt like going to vomit blood.

If I scold him too harshly, he will say "Mummy, you say the wrong thing... dun say that" blah blah blah

sigh being a parent is really tough.
 
poohy....
now i am trying out another way to deal with kids....not sure whether it will work or not.

Sometimes, the end of the day, when we are relaxing on the bed....I will chitchat with him. Saying the good things he has done, like " you know, I am proud of you today. You said your please and thank you and that is so polite." and then the notti things like " but that was really dangerous when you did not stop climbing up the table when I tell you to cos you might fell from the table. I was really worried that you might fall and hurt yourself. So you have to wait till you are tall enuff before you can turn on that light oki."

But that is cos I have only 1 kid...so I have lots of time to spare but maybe you can also do that to both J and S at the same time...like having a conversation.

Just a thought.
 
phantom,

thanks. I will try that out. hopefully it works... beyond just driving us up the wall, I am actually more concerned whether I had taught him the right things and that he will not go astray.
 
so envious... your 4 yr olds just started to climb table and chairs to reach for the light switch? en started long time ago, wen just started also.
 
cayden says :" You have to be nice to me oki. !"....

samuel says :"Mummy, you say the wrong thing... dun say that"

YX says : " you don't let me do this, I am upset with you! I don't give you sticker! ' (she was quite pissed when i said, it's ok i donwan the sticker' hahaha)

from school?? hehehe!

folic
 
folic.....hahhaa..that was funny....

I told Cayden off..."I am your mum...I am supposed to discipline you not to be nice to you"

If were you guys...how will you guys answer ?
 
well, i told yx b4, when she is in a nice mood and happy, and said, see? isn't it more fun to be happy and cheerful? if you are notti and I scold, u will cry and be upset and can't do anything else.. if you are happy and cheerful, then can do lots more.

this seems to have stopped the monster behavior that I gone thru in the beginning of Feb...
 
god i think this is a LW influence thing! there's something to be said abt western - style education and traditional chinese respect your elders style education huh?
 
i need to go back to mr fries abt this. so far ignatius only picked up "HEY MOM" and "HEY DAD" and religion related stuff from school.
more facts to fight my case on our religion related school for ignatius!
 
pax,
Agree with the girls. Should not associate going to CC as punishment. Don't worry, i think he'll settle in in no time.

Between a 4 yr old and a 2yr old in her terrible 2s, i think the 4 yr old is more angelic :p

folic,
Mine say, "You say that again, i'll send you to the notti corner"
 
I have 3 tickets to the show "In the garden" on 15th Mar 11am. Anyone interested? My bro originally wanted to go but can't due to some last minute changes.. Tickets at $17. If you need 4 tickets, I think phantom can give up one ticket as well. Let me know if you are interested.
 
cayden says :" You have to be nice to me oki. !"....

samuel says :"Mummy, you say the wrong thing... dun say that"

YX says : "you don't let me do this, I am upset with you! I don't give you sticker! '

J says: "You say that again, i'll send you to the notti corner"

Ashley says: "You r so rude. I'll write your name on the board" (learnt that from school--names on board = no outdoor play)
 
need to clear some air... i think my post came up wrongly. thks girls for all the advices...

M had fun in CCC today. in fact he was vv cooperative n happy to go. he shook all the teachers' hands, waved goodbye n went off. he din cry at all. had his bath. he din eat lunch bcos they served spagetti. he din nap i think. dun think he felt he was punished! :p

the issue of childcare has popped up many times before we made the final decision. it's my mom who surrendered and gave up. she told M herself that he was too notti, she dun wan to take care of him anymore. i dun hv a choice, forced into a corner. instead of thkg so much, putting him in CCC was the best solution for everybody... anyway the issue of notti din surface again. he was happy to see his new uniform n wan to go school tmr.

putting Jo in CCC last Oct was not a choice for me. i was forced into it bcos of my mom AGAIN! that time she said Jo was too active for her to take care (Jannie, Qdee, rmbr?)

fries
there's ntg wrong w CCC. jus that we pulled him out fr his previous CCC, so that he can hv a more structured eduaction environment before P1.... the other reason being that i wan to send him to a church kindergarten...
 
fries
u know i'v been gg thru 9 hrs of punishment daily bcos my mom complains non-stop that M is notti.
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like it's my fault. no choice but to remove.

SO FRUSTRATING LOR!
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Wanted to post something else last night then, as usual, went to entertain A before I had the chance.

Babygrace,
Ashley is also already thinking about her 5th birthday up til her 10th! *headache*

Pax,
dun be too hard on yourself n the kids because of your mom--CC is probably not the ideal choice for some of us (incl me), but it's not a bad choice n the kids r enjoying it so relax!
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Phantom/poohy/Jannie,
A also started climbing long ago (& also always purposely do it when I say no, then look at me)...before she turned 2. That was when the cane came into the picture. I think the cane works better when kids r younger cos reasoning doesn't work--i use conditioning: rebel=cane=pain. Now I've stopped using the cane cos it doesn't work anymore, reasoning is better, like how phantom does it "If U fall down, it'll be really painful etc etc"

Folic,
What's "In the garden" about? Did U catch the Slumdog Millionaire afterall?
A stopped her monster behaviour after the HK trip *cross fingers & toes* She'll still throw some "xiao-jie-pi-qi" tantrum but i think much better than b4...
We were at the Big Buddha. I'm not very religious (25% buddhist-75% free thinker), but she's been trained with regards to "bai-bai" from both sets of grandparents..I also "taught" her before..put palms together then say "bai-bai, let Ashley grow healthily & be a good girl". At the big Buddha, she auto did the "bai-bai" ritual herself:
Ashley: "Bai-bai for me to grow healthy & strong. Must be a good girl. Cannot be naughty. Must be happy & go to school. Cannot be sad and cry."
We thought it was hilarious!
 
good morning gals!

pax, i can understand the feeling of thinking CC is not as good as home care. I sent YX to CC partly cos my mum can't take care of her anymore. However, I have also to remind myself that my mum is not obligated to look after my kid and so I have to look for some alternatives that would work for all of us at home. The CC turns out to be an ok choice for YX, after all the major meltdowns in the initial period. Looking back, I now think the CC is a better choice than home. At least, she interacts with people her age and don turn into a xiao da ren.. altho she is already quite a mini adult now.. but i think it would be worse if she stayed at home. So, I think it is all good that M is happy in school.. you didn't even have to go through lots of wayang now, cos he is older and prob will be less traumatic for him.

omg, yes i went to watch slUmDOG millionaire.
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I thought it was a really good show. very insightful.
Ashley is very cute
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At least when she bai-bai, she is saying more or less the right thing.. and didnt ask to say konichiwa like somone i know.. hahahahahahah

folic
 
i'm so so relieved now that we made the right decision. Teacher jus updated me. he is having his nap now. had a big bowl of fish n spinach porridge n apples during lunch. he's settling well n started to play w other kids. at the kindergarten, he kept to himself a lot n only play w 1-2 kids. i think the kindergarten env also a little stiff for him.

folic
i think most of us feel home care is the best bcos most of us were brought up at home. thks for the reassurance. and yes, our parents are not obligated to look after our kids. if i can, i will take care of my kids myself. but sadly, i hv to work.
 
pax, M is just going back to where he started. so he should be ok. dun worry too much lah. he is a big boy already.

both my kids down with stomach virus. my house now smell like dunno what cos they vomitted everywhere. pax, take note of your 2 kids cos i dunno when en caught the virus. dunno if it was already onset when u visited on sunday. he started vomitting on tuesday.
 
pax,
Glad that M is settling down well.
Like folic, i can totally understand the worry about CC not being as good as home. At least the CC option can work for you. For me, CC is not an option cos I can't pick the kids early enough. When J was in infantcare, it was so stressful having to rush there.

In any case, i think kids are resilient while mothers are worry-warts
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I was so worried about the distance that J has to travel on the school bus, how hungry he will be and how early he has to wake up etc. He has settled in the routine well and takes his nap on the bus.
 
 
bbgrace
ya ya.. we worry for ntg sometimes.
i'm quite sure he's hv more fun in CCC than at home. he said more fun than his old school.
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jannie
noted..
 
Folic,
Thanks for the link! Mr omg got phobia liao after what happened the last time..haha! :p

Pax,
Great that M is settling well!
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omg.. that is quite a long time ago.. i think the venue and the theatre group plays a big part.. i have since banned that venue and shows by that group... i have tested it with another show and still fail but other shows in other places and by other theatre group, she is ok.
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Go try this one lah.. for kids 1-4 yrs.. i am sure if cry, she wont be the only one. hahahaha!

folic
 
my friend told me that la gourmet 7L thermal pot is going for $100 only. usual px $269. go grab it if u need a big thermal pot. taka.
 
happy birthday Ig and Fries!

I only have this to say. ..Terrible 2s,4s,6s... after Qistina every other kids seem like an angel.
The two girls quarrel, fight, scratch, pull hair, roll on the floor .. like little banshees. But i let them be .. coz that's how they bond, they'll learn the pain, heartache and learn to protect each other when their crazed mom pull out the cane. Q will always stop us from scolding nayli and assume responsibility. If i punished, i'll punish both doesnt matter who start the fight, who's the victim and who's the one being victimised.
 
thanks for the bday wishes! another year older but none the wiser. =P


hey, does any one wanna get anything from jshoppers? i'm like 930yen away from free shipping.
 
ladies, anyone interested in the 30% off for ON/GAP/BR? i got 1 discount code in my email. wondering whether any interest for a feb/mar05 pte spree. heehee

the discount code can be used from 12 mar onwards so not sure if the current online prices will be the same.
 
Hi babygrace,
Thanks for the toothpaste.
I am working at Tg Pagar area and stay near Pionerr station. Will you be able to meet me or you prefer to mail to me?
How much and how do i pay you?
 
btw, if interested, i will place orders on 12 Mar sharp coz the ON fundamentals sale where i want some of the cheap shorts, ends 12 Mar.
 
Septvirgo,
my office is at suntec. would you happen to come by suntec during lunch? Otherwise, we could do by mail. PM me your address and i will also give you by account for funds transfer.
 
Hi babygrace,
I don't think I can drop by Suntec on weekdays. I have PM you my mailing address. Please mail me the product and charge me the mailing cost as well. Thanks.
 
ok will order for GAP/ON/BR around 2pm.
everything is so cheap that we're far far from the USD180 cap for the GST. haha
right now phantom and me only USD 63. waiting for qdee's orders.
anyone else to share shipping?
 

poohy got it! all in stock at the moment. now waiting for qdee.

i think we now qualify for free domestic shipping. lemme confirm that when we check out.

we now stand at usd 130 before discount.

septvirgo, the website is www.gap.com

i need to go for meeting at 230pm so all orders need to be in by 210pm latest!
 
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