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A Singapore Motherhood Portal for the Singapore Parents * Matters Of The Heart * !!!!!!!!!! Anyone can help to advise? Divorce Issues < Previous Next >

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Octbride_78 (octbride_78)
Junior Member
Username: octbride_78

Post Number: 405
Registered: 12-2003
Posted on Saturday, July 10, 2010 - 12:45 am:   Edit Post Delete Post Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

Please help.
My sister is in the midst of divorcing her husband(found out has mistress but no evidence) now.
Got few hiccups/question:-
1) My sister has sort of argument with her own lawyer. Reason is due to the bil put a lock at the martimontal house. My sister called up her lawyer saying what if she needs to get her things. The lawyer asked my sis get the key from him. But my sister refused and says thats her own house and she has the right. The lawyer then says 'then who ask u to move out!'...

Question 1 : Can my sis change the lawyer? File in Feb 2010 this year. Any cost involved?

2) The husband requested for joint custody. He is willing to pay 1k for the son (10yr old).

Question 2: What is joint custody? If we dun want joint custody, does it mean we cant get 1k?

3) We would like to limit the access and overnight stay because the son doesnt want to see the father.

Question 3: Can we seek family counsellor for third party opinion to acccess the boy and let the judge knows? Because we dont want to create stress (esp suicidal) for the boy esp now he is v happy and doesnt want to see his father anymore.
 

SunshineG (sunshineg)
Junior Member
Username: sunshineg

Post Number: 351
Registered: 3-2009
Posted on Sunday, July 11, 2010 - 12:20 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

All your questions are more appropriately answered by your sister's lawyer.

About getting into the house to get her stuff, the most practical way is to ask her husb for the keys.

Qn 1: of course your sister can change lawyers. She will have to pay all the costs incurred by the current lawyer, as well as his fees to date.

Qn 2: joint custody
this is where both parents will agree on all major decisions for the child, e.g. school, religion etc. It is a separate issue from maintenance of the child (the $1k)

Qn 3: counsellor
It is possible to request for a counsellor and for the counsellor's opinion to be submitted to the court.

for Questions 2 & 3, you may want to read the Family Court's website FAQ - http://www.ifaq.gov.sg/subcourts/apps/fcd_faqmain.aspx

just follow the link above and type in your query.

hope this helps...
 

fab_fat (fab_mum)
New member
Username: fab_mum

Post Number: 15
Registered: 5-2010
Posted on Sunday, July 11, 2010 - 8:58 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

hi,

qn 2.
joint custody mean both parents gets to decide together major decision. eg: go wat school, religious.

care & console is who the child gets to stay with/ take care by. (usually judge in favour of mum, esp child in tender age)

& $1k is not ur bil want give then give, dun want give then dun give de. lawyer will fight for ur sister's rights. the amt is judge by the court, be it $1, $1k or $10k.
 

Octbride_78 (octbride_78)
Junior Member
Username: octbride_78

Post Number: 406
Registered: 12-2003
Posted on Monday, July 12, 2010 - 1:04 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

Thanks sunshineG and fab_fat

My sister received a call that the lawyer has called the other lawyer to seek for mediation.

Maybe its negotiation of terms i suppose.
 

fab_fat (fab_mum)
New member
Username: fab_mum

Post Number: 19
Registered: 5-2010
Posted on Monday, July 12, 2010 - 9:59 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

hope all goes well for ur sis.
infidelity is aldy hard to cope. moreover kids are involved.
the least one can do is the minimise the neg effects & get a reliable lawyer.
 

pizzagal (pizza123)
New member
Username: pizza123

Post Number: 3
Registered: 7-2010
Posted on Monday, July 12, 2010 - 10:20 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

Any1 have any idea whether a mother is guaranteed care n control of very young infant? I'm a housewife n he is a professional. Is there such thing as split care n control?
 

MLB (miorei)
Member
Username: miorei

Post Number: 1892
Registered: 4-2007
Posted on Thursday, July 15, 2010 - 4:35 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

pizzagal,

u may wish to consult legal aid or visit the nearest family service centre to find out more.
 

miracle (marjassg)
Junior Member
Username: marjassg

Post Number: 345
Registered: 3-2008
Posted on Thursday, July 15, 2010 - 4:44 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

pizzagal, normally no split care and control as it will confuse the child
 

WhiteClover (whiteclover)
Junior Member
Username: whiteclover

Post Number: 165
Registered: 10-2009
Posted on Sunday, July 18, 2010 - 1:04 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

i gone thru two mediation sessions. no result. ended up now in the pre-trial conference & waiting for hearing date. Let the judge decides lor... since both parties cannot compromise

And you mentioned the kid is 10 yrs old, to my understanding and what i read fm articles relating to custody care and control, the child's wishes can be heard and granted so long the mother is "normal" (no drug addiction, gambler, etc).

Sad to hear that alot of women... hving the same fate like me. But i do hope there is justice and judge will grant all bbs to natural mothers who are willing to care for the child. (of cos not for abusive mother or father)

Surrogate mothers cannot never replaced the natural mothers...
 

Wellness (health)
Junior Member
Username: health

Post Number: 124
Registered: 11-2008
Posted on Saturday, August 28, 2010 - 10:37 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

Dear Friends,

I am not really going thru Divorce yet but really wanted to go ahead with it...
My story is quite confusing so perhaps i leave it to another day...

Why i am here is i really need sound advice regarding custody.
I hv a note hinting my wife do not want the custody of the kids, can i use this note as evidence to get full custody ?

Below are the EXACT words from the note -

"i hope tat u can think over wat i had mentioned earlier, about the separation/divorce letter. i hope we can settle things nicely. i do not wish to let this thing turn out ugly, so to benefit the kids. as for the kids, i m willing to let u have them, since u wan them. but i will greatly appreciate if u could let me visit them often and bring them over to my place once a week, maybe overnight. Well, I strongly believe u can take care of them so much better dan i do, esp i hav a very bad temper.

I also strongly believe, by signing the letter will benefit us and will be much much better for us to face each other again."

So friends, do you think i can get custody based on the bold and underlined statement ?

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