| Author |
Message |
    
DIL (daughter_in_law)
Junior Member
Username: daughter_in_law
Post Number: 477
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Monday, December 24, 2007 - 12:03 pm: | 
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I purposely "abandoned" car to take MRT to work for past one week to rekindle memories how to use EZ link card :p. Anyway...
What I saw could be a norm but I drive most of the time so was very pissed with what I saw and experienced. Need to vent out!
1. A Malay mother and a 4/5 YO child was standing beside me in front of a rows of seats aorund 530pm. After a few stops, the child was tired and squatted down. I looked at the nearest people sitting there. One man (a labour worker) was sleeping soundly. One young lady (Uni or poly type) saw the young gal squat down and quickly close eyes to nap. All the poor mother can do si totell the child not to squat. Wah, I nearly wanted to shoot the young lady if not for my HB who stop me. (He is the one to take MRT everyday and told me it the norm). I am a mother of 3YO and 1YO... and I feel for the little gal.
2. Not related to above title but I realized young people like to just cut infront of you while you are walking. Most of the time, you "e brake". My reaction time very slow so cannot ebrake and get the fiere stares from these "lane cuters"
My HB was telling me these are the norms now. The younger generation are quite self centered nowsdays... No wonder many new staff in my organization act as if we own them a living...
sign... |
saki (hamasaki)
Intermediate Member
Username: hamasaki
Post Number: 4396
Registered: 7-2004
| | Posted on Monday, December 24, 2007 - 12:22 pm: |
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These are all inconsiderate n heartless pple who dun give a darm to others.. Only for themselves so such pple are so selfish n disgusting.. |
Jenny (snowpooher)
Advanced Member
Username: snowpooher
Post Number: 7997
Registered: 3-2004
| | Posted on Monday, December 24, 2007 - 2:33 pm: |
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Yes, younger generation now are quite self centered. They dun offer seats, dun offer to press the lift for others even they stand just beside the buttons! I really can't stand those ppl who stand beside the buttons not to press the "open" key for ppl to enter/exit the lift.
And also, they can use the mirror for long time, no considerate to move aside for those who need to use the basin. |
Ozzie (ozlee)
Member
Username: ozlee
Post Number: 544
Registered: 11-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 26, 2007 - 9:43 am: |
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Hi DIL
maybe you want to shoot your hubby first?
if people accept such selfish behaviors as the "norm" and "acceptable", then guess what... it will be one day, or already as you noticed. |
Ozzie (ozlee)
Member
Username: ozlee
Post Number: 545
Registered: 11-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 26, 2007 - 9:55 am: |
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Hi DIL
maybe you want to "shoot" your hubby first?
if people accept such selfish behaviors as the "norm" and "acceptable", then guess what... it will be one day, or already as you noticed. |
tamarind (tamarind)
Intermediate Member
Username: tamarind
Post Number: 4953
Registered: 4-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 26, 2007 - 10:04 am: |
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I have noticed a few times in the MRT, where no one gives up their seat to pregnant ladies. I also feel very angry, but I don't dare to open my mouth to ask other people to give up their seat. I wonder how many people dare to do so ?
I have encountered an MRT officer who asked a young man to give up his seat to my 70+ year old father before. But he is the MRT officer, if I were to asked, I would probably be ignored, or be scolded. |
Ozzie (ozlee)
Member
Username: ozlee
Post Number: 549
Registered: 11-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 26, 2007 - 10:11 am: |
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Hi DIL
maybe you want to "shoot" your hubby first?
if people accept such selfish behaviors as the "norm" and "acceptable", then guess what... it will be one day, or already as you noticed. |
Ozzie (ozlee)
Member
Username: ozlee
Post Number: 552
Registered: 11-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 26, 2007 - 1:43 pm: |
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Hi DIL
maybe you want to "shoot" your hubby first?
if people accept such selfish behaviors as the "norm" and "acceptable", then guess what... it will be one day, or already as you noticed. |
babylush (lushqueen)
Junior Member
Username: lushqueen
Post Number: 102
Registered: 7-2007
| | Posted on Thursday, December 27, 2007 - 12:04 am: |
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I notice that very seldom will there be people giving up their seats in the train, be it pregnant, young or old.
At first I resigned to my fate and thought that my tummy is not obvious so nobody will give up their seats for me. However, once i saw a heavily pregnant woman also had to stand for at least half her journey and finally got her seat only when 1 passenger got off the train. |
DIL (daughter_in_law)
Junior Member
Username: daughter_in_law
Post Number: 488
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 27, 2007 - 1:40 pm: |
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Hi Ozzie: Let just say my husband knows my character and thus stop me before something happen.
Shame on that young man who had to be asked to shift his a**. Wah, just hearing make my blood boil. Wonder how the parents teach these young man (people).
That being said, I am also mother of two gals. Trying very hard to teach them "correctly". Do not want to end up like many young people out there. |
Anch (anch1174)
New member
Username: anch1174
Post Number: 6
Registered: 11-2007
| | Posted on Friday, December 28, 2007 - 12:42 pm: |
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Hi DIL,
Your story reminds me of my grandmother. She is old and is hunchback. So when she walks, she sort of shuffles around.
But she is very good at getting seats on the MRT. I saw her in action before. She will shuffles herself to the person sitting and glare at that person. And because she is short, her face is directly in front of the person seated.
If that person is sleeping, she will talk loudly to indicate that she is there and without a seat. That person sitting will be so embarrassed and have to give way to her.
I know that this is not a nice thing to do, but it's amazing that people will just ignore those who need it more. This is why my grandmother has to fight for her rights. |
Kell (closetdoor)
Junior Member
Username: closetdoor
Post Number: 155
Registered: 10-2007
| | Posted on Wednesday, January 02, 2008 - 11:26 am: |
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I got a gal friend who is quite daring. When I was with her in the train, she exclaimed very loudly saying things like no body giving seats to pregnant ladies, tummy so obvious liao still can't see... Until a lady let me have a seat one station later. Haha. But for me, I would stand in front of the row of seats (MRT) and hope for a space. :p Still very passive... |
3bagsfull (3bagsfull)
Junior Member
Username: 3bagsfull
Post Number: 333
Registered: 5-2007
| | Posted on Saturday, January 05, 2008 - 2:06 pm: |
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Maybe I shld share my personal experience when I was heavily pregnant with my elder son few years back.
I normally drove but that time i was in my 36 weeks and thus my hubby thot I shld not be driving anymore cos tummy too big. Anyway, I took the NEL 1 night, with my colleague. We boarded at Clark Quay and all the seats were filled already. So we stood in front of a chinese couples who look trim and fit and reasonably educated in their mid 50's, who immediately went into nap when we appeared in front of them.
Anyway me and my colleague started chatting. Some how my colleague commented that no one is giving up seats to the needy. I wasn't actually expecting a seat cos the train wasn't really packed and I was still very agile then, so i jokingly replied to my colleague that "maybe ppl think I was faking my pregnancy lor, under my top is actually a pot, not a baby ha ha...". Upon hearing that, the couple suddenly "woke up" and gave me a head to toe, toe to head stare, and then went back to their beauty sleep.
So when i had my 2nd kid last year, I drove to work till the very last day b4 my delivery.
I just find it amusing. Think the responsibilities really lie in us, the parents, to inculcate the correct value. If we dont be the role modle and do what we preach in the 1st place, there's no use keep saying "u shld" cos the kids just don't find it "real".
Seriously, i think the education system in Singapore has kinda strayed. They only focus on results but not the important values in life. |
DIL (daughter_in_law)
Member
Username: daughter_in_law
Post Number: 516
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Sunday, January 06, 2008 - 2:15 pm: |
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Anch: It is very brave of your grandmother to do that. Older folks of that generation tend to be more sympathetic, understanding and accept their lot.
Kell: hahaha... At least your colleague got what she wanted. I recalled one collegaue (male) relating his experience. He was in the MRT when one couple (husband with pregant wife). His reaction a bit slow after a long day, he was about to stand up when the husband loudly, rudely and demeaningly demanded seat for his wife. Everyone was shocked at being scolded for nothing. My colleague (woke up now) retorted " YOU got her pregant. Not us. Why should be pay for what you did? ASK NICELY if you want seat lah." The couple got out at the next station red faced :P
I am the lucky type to have seats when I had chance to take public transport. be it during pregancy or with strolller. So not much complains except with what I saw.
However, I do agree that we have to be role models o show our child. For example, it is very common to see parents (with children) not saying thanks when other press the lift for them. I, for one, will tell my children it is not nice not to say thanks when someone has help you. RIGHT in front of the family. May appear not good but my purpose is NOT to scold the family but to teach my children when the experience/scenrio is still fresh and just happen. |
Kell (closetdoor)
Junior Member
Username: closetdoor
Post Number: 170
Registered: 10-2007
| | Posted on Tuesday, January 08, 2008 - 9:04 am: |
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Yes, i think w kids in tow, we have to watch our behaviour. They have short attention span, so i think its right to correct them then and there. Dun have to bother abt the other family. Most of the times they wun be saying anything back. Cos if they do so, they are admitting to their mistake in public liao. :x
Dun want kids to grow up ungracious. Think most kids nowadays are quite self-centred. So its bad. |
Amy Quek (qcx_amy)
New member
Username: qcx_amy
Post Number: 64
Registered: 7-2007
| | Posted on Tuesday, January 08, 2008 - 6:10 pm: |
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Hi,
Just 1 2 share this so far i have been very lucky since my pregnancy, not every morning but at least 8 out of 10 times when i take public transport i will be given a seat so far so good  but what i cannot stand are teenagers nowadays... They hog the door at the MRT, expecially the couples act like everyone else is transparent, hugging each other at the entrance of the MRT and also those youngsters that dash up the train to grab a seat so that they can play with their games and when i c mothers who encourage that kind of behaviour i get even more angry... The kid looks like sec sch age but the parents/mum let the child have the seat so that the child can play with his PSP... What is the world coming too? And i have also encounter kids that board the MRT/bus demanding seats... They will get into the cabin and say things like 'I want to sit down, i want to sit down, how come no seats?' I am amazed that yong children at their age can say things like that, makes me feel that they have been 'programmed' to do it when they board crowded public transport... |
3bagsfull (3bagsfull)
Junior Member
Username: 3bagsfull
Post Number: 343
Registered: 5-2007
| | Posted on Tuesday, January 08, 2008 - 11:39 pm: |
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Just to share too. When I was in HK travelling with my kids on public transportation (and I travel there pretty often), it's like 90% of time I would be given seat cos I was pushing the stroller or carrying my kids, and most of the time, u won't expect them to do so cos they are the typical "bengs" in local context, some even look like gangster but yet, when they see u in need, they will just stand up immediately and let u sit down.
I think it's really about the values that the parents passed on to the kids unconsciously by being the role model.
So we mommies really must do a good job in being a good role model to our kids. |
thesnow (thesnow)
Member
Username: thesnow
Post Number: 661
Registered: 2-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, January 09, 2008 - 3:16 pm: |
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YES, I agreed its the values that parents passed on to the kids.
Recently, I board the train at JE MRT (towards Marina Bay) at ard 6pm, I saw a boy (ard 10yo) dashed into the train, putting his left hand on a seat and spreaded his groceries filled plastic bags across 2 seats on his right.
At this time, the train is quite crowded, many pple standing in front of the seats and stared at him.
Finally the "zu jiao" arrived, parents and brother, and sat down without shame.
What disgusted me was the mother praised her son for "reserving" the seats for them.....!!!!
OMG!!!!!
Once I alighted, I quickly "brain-washed" my daughter..... |
dumbger (dumbger)
Member
Username: dumbger
Post Number: 1047
Registered: 3-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, January 09, 2008 - 11:18 pm: |
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haha, during my pregnancy, my worst experience was this episode in the MRT. i was 30wks or so, boarded at Chinatown on NEL to my home at SK but no one gave up seat to me. lucky at dhoby ghaut interchange pple left so i managed to get one seat.
but then 3 stops later at boon keng a more pregnant lady entered the train, looks like gonna give birth any time. no one gave up seat for her, so i gave my seat to her. she was a bit paiseh lah, cos i also pregnant mah. but i told her she's more advanced than me, so let her sit.
you would think after seeing a pregnant lady give up a seat for another pregnant lady, someone would know how to zi tong right? but no! i stood all the way to hougang where the pregnant lady alighted and i sat back down at my seat! faint... |
3bagsfull (3bagsfull)
Junior Member
Username: 3bagsfull
Post Number: 346
Registered: 5-2007
| | Posted on Friday, January 11, 2008 - 11:13 pm: |
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dumbger
wah urs experience is really classic!!
few days back MM Lee was talking about that he wld probably not be able to see Singapore becoming a more gracious society. I guess we'll only see improvement in, say, 40 years time, cos it takes almost a whole generation to undo this ungraciousness inculcated in our generation. If we do a good job now, maybe in 40 years time when our kids grow up, there would be slight improvement -- just in time when we need a seat badly on mrt/buses. LOL. :P |
llig (llig)
New member
Username: llig
Post Number: 43
Registered: 12-2006
| | Posted on Sunday, January 13, 2008 - 4:09 pm: |
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tamarind,
I actually do ask for seats for preggies or those carrying kids. My fren says i'm brave/crazy but its just that I can't tahan seeing 'injustice' la..
What i normally do is ask the person if she needs a seat, and normally the ans is an embarassed 'no' but i would still turn to the nearest person and ask if they can pls let the woman sit becos she's preg/carrying baby. So far, the reaction has always been 'oh, i didn't notice' and they quickly get up, and suddenly their neighbours start looking around to see if there are other 'needy' folks. haha..
Think people should help others ask for seats becos asking for oneself can be quite embarassing. (i've never asked for myself even when i was preggers and normally ended up standing for most of my 20mins train rides)
DIL, i too will strive to teach my son to be a gentleman. |
victory (victory)
New member
Username: victory
Post Number: 6
Registered: 7-2007
| | Posted on Monday, February 25, 2008 - 3:38 pm: |
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Just to share too. when I was pregnant, most times people do give up their seats for me on the NEL. But there was this man who, like what some mummies experience, shut his eyes and went to sleep once he saw me board the train. When someone alighted a few stops later, I got a seat a few seats away from him, and he immediately "woke up" and stayed awake for the rest of the journey!
On the bus 190 that ply the expressway, however, people seldom give up their seats. They dun pretend to sleep either. They just look straight through you as if they can't see you are pregnant or it makes no difference to them whether you are pregnant or not. Probably becos they think they deserve the seat as they have a long journey home?! |
KyMi (kymi)
New member
Username: kymi
Post Number: 9
Registered: 12-2007
| | Posted on Monday, February 25, 2008 - 5:22 pm: |
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Hi Victory,
Sad to say thru out my pregnancy only 10 kind hearted people give up their sit for me on the NEL.
You are so lucky.... me got to stand all the way from dohby ghaut to punggol..... |
Reddates (reddates)
New member
Username: reddates
Post Number: 49
Registered: 7-2007
| | Posted on Monday, February 25, 2008 - 8:33 pm: |
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I dun expect ppl to let their seats for me when I'm pregnant. Sometimes it's tat they are paying for the trip and they are tired oso. Ppl nowadays will think tat this is their rights, whether u r needy, pregnant, elderly etc....if u think tat u need the seat more, take a few station back where there's not much ppl so you will have a seat. I can see tat elderly nowadays oso very rude, they think they own the way or wat. They are all sorts of ppl ard. |
victory (victory)
New member
Username: victory
Post Number: 7
Registered: 7-2007
| | Posted on Tuesday, February 26, 2008 - 11:29 am: |
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agree with reddates. When I'm really tired after a long day's work, I take the NEL all the way back to habourfront. That way sure can get seat one. No need to depend on people giving up seats for me. |
Vinn (vinn)
Junior Member
Username: vinn
Post Number: 144
Registered: 10-2007
| | Posted on Wednesday, February 27, 2008 - 8:24 am: |
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I rem there was once when I was preg wif my 2nd bb. I took bus carrying my 1 yr old girl. The bus was full so no doubt hav to stand. No one gave up their seat as well even thou they are young ppl.
Imagine, hv to stand a few stops. Then when someone got down the bus, I will hv a seat.
Wat's going on in this world??? |
shelled (shelled)
New member
Username: shelled
Post Number: 3
Registered: 2-2008
| | Posted on Friday, February 29, 2008 - 5:26 am: |
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I also agree with reddates. I never believed that anyone is obliged to give up their seats. We are all paying passengers, and we don't really know what the so-called "self-centred" passengers have gone through in their day.
Personally what I feel is this:
If you want a seat, take a taxi. Or wait for your hubby/friend/relative to drive you out in a private car.
When I was heavily pregnant, and no one gave their seats to me, I did not berate anyone. My only complain was why we are not well-off enough to own a car. Or why I didn't choose to take a taxi. |
Dahz (closetdoor)
Junior Member
Username: closetdoor
Post Number: 404
Registered: 10-2007
| | Posted on Friday, February 29, 2008 - 11:54 am: |
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With the hike in crude oil and taxi fares, more people are taking the trains.
Most of the time I am reduced to standing at/near the door, sandwiched btw others. I am fine with no seats, not as it preggy=disabled... Just that some ppl refused to budge. How I am supposed to alight... Then when the doors open, people just rush in. Sometimes I see ppl in wheelchairs or pushing pram, "forcing" their way out too...
Now at 38 wks... So worried of ppl pushing me... Pushing me at my tummy. |
loomi (loomi)
New member
Username: loomi
Post Number: 10
Registered: 10-2007
| | Posted on Wednesday, March 05, 2008 - 10:30 am: |
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I am 7mths into pregnancy now, I take the train to work everyday. To date only 3 person have given up seats to me. Well... you may think this is no stranger ... but I am not in Spore. I am in JAPAN !!! Yes, everyone say how courteous and polite Japanese are, they have special seats for the needy and nobody dare to sit, BullS*** !!!
On top of this, you can pick up a small tag at any station which has a pic of mama and baby and a message that says "I have a baby in my stomach" to hang on your bag. This tag is very useful for first trimester when you are still flat and feeling uncomfortable with MS etc .... There are signs at priority seats area asking people to give up seat when you see someone with this tag. (Just side track... imagine if this tag system is available in Spore... you can imagine the flux of 1st tri pregnant ladies overnight, after 2 yrs of taking same train same time, you realize this same "pregnant" lady you see everyday on train with stomach that never grow ... hmmm... some might be even well into menopause age to be pregnant but having this tag on their bag demanding for seats ... haha .. just my joke when I imagine this tag available in Spore)
Since I started my 3rd Tri and weather getting warmer, my puffy coat is gone, I no longer look fat under the thick coat but more pregnant now. But last few days, my experience on the train really disappoint me. Well, if someone pretend to sleep, ok.. I can guess you really want to sit down and maybe tired, but all these middle aged men, just stare at you and ignore you, even you are standing at priority area, ok maybe you think I am just plain FAT, but there is a tag hanging on my bag staring at you telling you this lady is pregnant !! Hey, still don't get the message ???? Well, I was told by my japanese colleagues, they are MCP, they thinks women should stay at home and not running around especially when they are preggy !!
The latest incident, was this young couple sitting at the priority area... the young lady noticed me and whisper whisper to her bf. Guess who gave up the seat to me, the gal !!! and guess what the BF did after his gal was left standing ... he pretend to Zzzzz and con't the journey and they alight together .... what a jerk ! My husband says that's the virtue of Japanese gal ... they do everything for their man. There you go ... the famous saying of Japanese gal are the best GF/Wife to have !! At least this saying is true ... guess polite and courteous are no longer valid. |
Koalarie (evonlimsy)
Intermediate Member
Username: evonlimsy
Post Number: 3322
Registered: 9-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, March 05, 2008 - 9:28 pm: |
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Hi Loomi,
interesting to read about this.... which part of japan do you stay? These guys are really too mcp. |
victory (victory)
New member
Username: victory
Post Number: 46
Registered: 7-2007
| | Posted on Wednesday, March 05, 2008 - 10:03 pm: |
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I thought only singaporeans dun give up seats. didn't realise that it's like that in Japan too! |
loomi (loomi)
New member
Username: loomi
Post Number: 17
Registered: 10-2007
| | Posted on Thursday, March 06, 2008 - 1:52 pm: |
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Tokyo, guess is city life, Japanese work late, sleep late, so in the morning most of them are dead beat, want to sit down and Zzzz.
Not all are so bad actually, once a ah ma give me sit, just because I was wearing a mask cos was down with cough not even preggy then. |
Diana (september)
Junior Member
Username: september
Post Number: 206
Registered: 3-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, March 06, 2008 - 4:18 pm: |
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it is so common tat people dun gif up seat. and worse is tat wen the door open, those people who rush in to get seat can nv see a preggie lady and push their way thru lor.
i remember got once wen i board the mrt, all the seat are taken. i was standing in front of the seat near the door, where a teenage gal was sitting. she was playing wif her hp or someting and beside her sit a middle age couple. then i saw the lady (probably the gal mother) whisper to the teenage gal and then after tat the gal stop playing wif her hp but pretend to zzz as she nv once lift up her head. few stops pass and a kind lady sitting the same row of seat as this family, ask me to go over coz beside her got an empty seat. then finally, the teen gal 'wake up' and lift her head up.
wat kind of good teaching the parent is teaching their child lor! |
09022007 (09022007)
Junior Member
Username: 09022007
Post Number: 111
Registered: 7-2007
| | Posted on Friday, March 07, 2008 - 5:10 pm: |
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there r kind soul who does give up their seat for preggie but 8 out of 10 doesn't.
i recall when i was 36 weeks preggie carrying a big but not so heavy luggage alighting from a bus. a young man was juz behind me & guess what he does? instead of helping me with the luggage, he juz stood there looking at me (maybe he wanted to see how a preggie woman carry a big luggage down the stairs!). of cos, it's not a must for him to help (& i don't expect it anyway) but would you not help? |
Petrina (hazuki)
Member
Username: hazuki
Post Number: 1460
Registered: 8-2007
| | Posted on Saturday, March 08, 2008 - 4:29 am: |
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juz 2wks ago, i decided to go home for dinner at my parent's plc. My hb was working late. so we decided to head there individually.
Long time nv take mrt frm bouna vista - bt panjang liao.. this is my experience...
boarded train. no seats. stand near door cause too packed.
alighted at JE station waiting to board train to CCK. too many ppl squeezing so i let them go in first.
i was last person to enter as there is a slot.
door not closed yet. suddenly the next train frm pasir ris arrived..
then ppl started to run to the middle train *which i was in*.
1 young man, talking on hp, used his body to push me inwards. i told him, no space. as i his leg was still outside. but he dun care, carried on pushing. in the end, to save myself, i exited the train.
lots ppl at platform stared at me. M i in the wrong? i felt so paiseh after exiting the train...
anyway, 1min ltr, another empty train came liao. there were plenty of seats...
i was thinking, lucky i nv persist in staying on tat train..
then i sat at first seat near entrance, a lady sat next to me, she told me. it's like tat de. nxt time, train too packed, dun enter... |
doris (royndor)
Junior Member
Username: royndor
Post Number: 360
Registered: 3-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, March 27, 2008 - 5:26 pm: |
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wah din realise so many incidents..
being preggy myself, i will say so far not too bad, there are still ppl who will give up seats.. sometimes i will change bus to get seats..
But once i ever encounter, a schoolboy 'snatching' seats with me! oh gosh! both of us staying as he's more agile (definitely since i'm abt 32w) sum more gimme a 'proud' look.. |
oink17 (oink17)
New member
Username: oink17
Post Number: 12
Registered: 11-2007
| | Posted on Friday, April 04, 2008 - 5:56 pm: |
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hi all
Im currently 32 weeks pregnant and took NEL line to and from work.
Of all my trips, I can count using my 5 fingers the number of times someone give up their seats for me.
People look at me and still continue on with the journey. It's no big deal for them.
Not alot of people will give up their seats. To them, being pregnant does not mean you will get the privilege of getting seats on the MRT.
To me, it feels like a 1st come, 1st serve basis.
U board the train with empty seats, good for you.
You board the train later and there's no seats, too bad. |
myboyedison (myboyedison)
New member
Username: myboyedison
Post Number: 3
Registered: 4-2008
| | Posted on Saturday, April 05, 2008 - 7:11 am: |
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agree with oink17, 1st come 1st serve, don't expect to be offered a seat. when i was preggy, i do get seats (sometimes don't, of cos) from some kind soul but most of the time i would tell them that i don't need it cos just 4-5 stops away. moreover, have been sitting whole day in office, it's alright to stand for a while. |
Nor (nabmum)
Member
Username: nabmum
Post Number: 978
Registered: 9-2007
| | Posted on Thursday, April 17, 2008 - 10:37 pm: |
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I think ppl so ignorant nowadays they are blind to preggy ppl. Last time i would travel from Boonlay to Woodlands, no seat. Was so tired due to overtime i just heck care took off my shoes and sat on the intercarriage. Chose that spot due to there's a railing so i can pull myself back up again Even if is a 1st ome 1st serve basis, what differs is if u have compassion lor Dun tell me if u see sickly elderly who can barely balence or stand but dun offer a seat to them. But funnily when these youngsters are in the situation, eg if the sprain/fractured their ankle due to soccer match... then they EXPECT to be given a seat? Suddenly the 1st come 1st serve theory dun apply to them ah....
Another think i hate about taking the train when im preggy is that as Petrina pointed out, they like to SHOVE into you. Dun they see that ur tummys need space  |
LOH LYE CHING (lesley)
New member
Username: lesley
Post Number: 1
Registered: 4-2008
| | Posted on Saturday, April 19, 2008 - 10:35 pm: |
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As for me, I was about 7 mths pregnant at that time, I went into the MRT train, actually that's a seat & I was walking towards to sit, but a lady walk faster than me, she sat down & when she saw me walking towards, she close her eyes, pretending to sleep. I was so angry that I phoned my husband in front of her & I purposely said quite loud,"Some Singaporean really that tired? Still can pretend to sleep when seeing a pregnant woman without a seat. So shameful & unconsiderate." At least I can vent my anger. |
LOH LYE CHING (lesley)
New member
Username: lesley
Post Number: 2
Registered: 4-2008
| | Posted on Saturday, April 19, 2008 - 10:46 pm: |
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There's another incident, I just got pregnant to my 2nd child at that time. I will black out if I stand too long, & there's once I got blackout, nobody give seat to me, but lucky, tahan until I reach my office. My friend taught me to ask the fellow who is sittingin front of you to give up the seat to me if I got black out again. I followed what my friend taught me, & it's really works. That guy is sleeping, I woke him up, I told him that I was about to faint, when he saw my pale face, he stand up immediately but he's a bit pai se, cos he's also pretending to sleep. |
Liana (meekfreek)
Member
Username: meekfreek
Post Number: 831
Registered: 3-2007
| | Posted on Monday, April 21, 2008 - 9:49 pm: |
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Has anyone ever asked for a seat before? Can't imagine Singaporeans being so selfish and not giving one up if they were requested to do so politely....
I think they need MRT officers to man the carriages and make people stand up for the needy....if not get FINED!! |
Catz (catz)
Advanced Member
Username: catz
Post Number: 8648
Registered: 9-2001
| | Posted on Monday, April 21, 2008 - 9:56 pm: |
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Liana, actually I *can* imagine someone saying no leh.. Singaporeans can be pretty barbaric at times. |
Tan Leng Leng (tanlengleng)
Senior Member
Username: tanlengleng
Post Number: 11157
Registered: 3-2006
| | Posted on Monday, April 28, 2008 - 3:37 pm: |
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Current I'm 7 mths pregnant...
Last week I took a bus home,
guess what...
It's an elderly lady who gave up her seat to me,
youngsters all all pretending to sleep.. hiazzz... |
WoodlandsMummy (woodlandsmummy)
New member
Username: woodlandsmummy
Post Number: 19
Registered: 5-2008
| | Posted on Sunday, May 18, 2008 - 11:55 am: |
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Hi hi me currently 5mths + preg also can use my 10 fingers to count the no of ppl who offer their seat to me while on train...the most angry moment is that they keep staring at my tummy yet they dont want to offer their seat to me...sometimes really have the urge to tell them off that i am preg not FAT!!!...Dont stare at me if u r not going to give up your seat to me...sometimes when i am offer a seat, it was from elderly ppl (which make me so pai sey)...
yesterday, i was with my 3yrs old boy on the mrt, the ppl were all awake...they just stare at my boy and myself...yet no one offer their seat to my me & my boy...all i can do was to keep telling my boy to hold tied to the pole... |
gloyt (gloyt)
New member
Username: gloyt
Post Number: 95
Registered: 1-2008
| | Posted on Wednesday, May 28, 2008 - 11:56 am: |
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Hi Preg mummies,
I encounter the same thing too. Even now that I am 8months + preg. There were women and men who just shut their eyes when they see me board the MRT !?? Ridiculous right. But what I do is I tap on them ( those who occupy the needy seats) to excuse their seats for me as I really can't stand for long. No need to be shy about it as they are good well beings taking up needy seats to sleep or pay PSP! |
o)-@xx (ryatie22)
Member
Username: ryatie22
Post Number: 829
Registered: 2-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, May 28, 2008 - 12:27 pm: |
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i realli like the idea abt the tag in Japan cos' my stomach will only grow bigger till 6mths..as it's long wait...realli hoping for such miracle to get a sit in the train n bus.
anyway like the idea tat Australian imposed for the school children taking the trains or bus @subsidised rates are suppose to give up sits to elder, pregnant or needy...if they dun du so, they'll be summoned. i encounter a true experience when i was taking a bus there with lots of shoppings bags, n this teenager boy came to me n giveup his seat...mind u i was not even pregnant...n i was so impress...hope our teenagers r like tat...ur gov should impose such rule then they'll follow |
springizsprung (springizsprung)
New member
Username: springizsprung
Post Number: 19
Registered: 5-2008
| | Posted on Wednesday, May 28, 2008 - 8:09 pm: |
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Am encounting the same problem as well....
Last year, I was preg 6mths and taking my 3 yrs gal for my gynae's appt. Due to my appt time is in the morng and i cant get a taxi so had to travel by bus. The bus was crowded wif ppl and was stuffy,noone willing to give their seat. Until I was almost fainted in side the bus then there's one uncle offer his seat for me.... |
o)-@xx (ryatie22)
Member
Username: ryatie22
Post Number: 832
Registered: 2-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, May 29, 2008 - 9:18 am: |
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springizsprung
ya lor ..tat day i take train also an uncle offer me the seats..so paiseh but no choice i felt like 1 2 faint like tat..althou there was a lady sitting n talking in the train ..she didn't offer me her seat althou i taken out medical oitment to put on my nose..so miserable.... |
carnellin (carnellin)
Member
Username: carnellin
Post Number: 993
Registered: 11-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, May 29, 2008 - 5:52 pm: |
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hi mommies,
heehee, i thought nobody will care about this since people in mrt looked quite ignorance. i'm not a singaporean and quite surprise how people can literally pretend to sleep the minute they saw me with my 3 year old. there even time when i push my stroller (with a lot of difficulty during rush hour) and this indian lady knew i'm having difficulty and get that opportunity to cut my way and in the end her feet got hit by the stroller's wheel and she speak loudly to her friend how i dont apologize to her. even her friend told her you might be on her way. she kept on yapping, my husband told me to ignore this kind a person. unbelievable.
i also dont understand to those people who like to cut the queue when they knew we dont have any choice than to take lift when carrying stroller yet they still push me to the back and get inside first, no wonder one mommy protest at Today's paper couple months ago.
the problem is why people are so lazy and dont care when other people have no choice with their difficulty.
but i truly complement to some malay teenager who got up and even said to his friend to stand up and give their seats to the needy..i'm a chinese but never a chinese boy gave up their seat to my gal
only old people that gave my gal because they afraid my gal might fall down, are the youngsters here are so weak that they can not stand up and have to be pregnant mommies, old folks with heavy plastic bags and young kids that have to stand up in public transportation? |
kmom (kmom)
Junior Member
Username: kmom
Post Number: 153
Registered: 1-2006
| | Posted on Friday, May 30, 2008 - 2:55 pm: |
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Hi carnellin,
It's very sad to see people behave this way ya? I stay in Jurong West and work in Novena... everyday i'll take MRT to and from work. Am 31 weeks pregnant now. I have a huge tummy, i have encountered all kinds of human beings who are temporary blind, suddenly fell into coma but wakes up at their stop, PSP ppl who had their eyes glued to their game, abled young ppl fighting with me to get into the train... Sad to say, be it school kids, working class men/women, uncles/aunties... these kind of inconsiderate ppl exists!
I had one experience whereby i was standing at the "please give ur seats to those who need them more" and this middle age man just ignored me and read his papers... one working young man boarded the train, saw what was going on... called the middle age man and ask him to look at me! The man jumped out of his seat and guess what, I thank the yound man instead! My hero! |
WoodlandsMummy (woodlandsmummy)
New member
Username: woodlandsmummy
Post Number: 24
Registered: 5-2008
| | Posted on Friday, May 30, 2008 - 7:57 pm: |
|
that day on bus also nobody give up their seat to me untill someone lost her balance and knocked into my tummy...then ppl started to offer me their seat! |
victory (victory)
New member
Username: victory
Post Number: 100
Registered: 7-2007
| | Posted on Saturday, May 31, 2008 - 11:23 am: |
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reminds me of the other time when I was pregnant and standing in a very crowded bus to work. The bus driver suddenly jerk to a stop and I nearly fell on the passenger standing next to me. Then a middle age woman offered her seat for me..... |
marchblossom (marchblossom)
New member
Username: marchblossom
Post Number: 9
Registered: 4-2007
| | Posted on Thursday, July 24, 2008 - 7:50 am: |
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when i was preggie abt 7 months and boarded a crowded bus, the bus captain holler at a passenger in front of the bus to give up his seat. Then only he drive on. Kind of funny the way it was handled but appreciate the kind gestures- from both. The bus captain and the unwilling/willing passenger. |
7Pooh (7pooh)
Member
Username: 7pooh
Post Number: 975
Registered: 7-2007
| | Posted on Friday, July 25, 2008 - 11:12 pm: |
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In Japan, there are special designated cabins in their railway for women. Wonder if SMRT can consider allocating 1 or 2 cabins for preg mums and put in extra seats. Ha ha.. wild thoughts.. |
cafren Chin (cafren)
New member
Username: cafren
Post Number: 6
Registered: 7-2008
| | Posted on Sunday, July 27, 2008 - 1:03 am: |
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Esp in MRT , it is a norm that people dont give up seat. |
eve yong (evebo0m)
New member
Username: evebo0m
Post Number: 5
Registered: 7-2008
| | Posted on Monday, July 28, 2008 - 4:04 am: |
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i remember i encounter once i gave up a seat for a pregnant lady in bus. she was 8mths pregnant while i was 6mths pregnant. isn't singapore pathetic?? to e extend nobody willing to give up seat for e lady. she's not only pregnant, she brought along a child too lor!! |
jan jan (jan4january)
New member
Username: jan4january
Post Number: 22
Registered: 8-2007
| | Posted on Friday, August 01, 2008 - 3:43 pm: |
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i think pregnant women understand another pregnant women needs more than others. yes i agree that it is a norm of not giving seats. really sad, in this country. |
tamarind (tamarind)
Advanced Member
Username: tamarind
Post Number: 6120
Registered: 4-2005
| | Posted on Monday, August 04, 2008 - 11:13 am: |
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A few days ago when I take the MRT during the morning rush hour, I saw at least 3 pregnant women in the crowded cabin.
All those sitting at the Priority seats were all young men/women. All of them doing the same thing. Closing their eyes and pretending to sleep.
I wish I had more courage to help by asking those people to wake up !!!
|
o)-@xx (ryatie22)
Member
Username: ryatie22
Post Number: 1231
Registered: 2-2005
| | Posted on Monday, August 04, 2008 - 11:21 am: |
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i was on the train last month n pretty sure tat my tummy was big enuff to be seen. A gal ifo me was playing with psp beside her was a man in early 50s..another side was 2 ladies in late 30 talking non-stop all the way but no one offer me me their sit n worst it they can still look at me..
those mrt officer in the train should go round n du sum checking 2 tell this ppl to give up their sits...like tamarind..i dun have the courage to tell them off.. |
tamarind (tamarind)
Advanced Member
Username: tamarind
Post Number: 6121
Registered: 4-2005
| | Posted on Monday, August 04, 2008 - 12:19 pm: |
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Sigh...some people can be really nasty. Best if they just ignore us, worst if they started to make a big fuss and scold us or even get physical. I am only a very weak woman
I don't mean all Singaporeans are like this. The area where I stay has a huge population of foreigners.
|
WoodlandsMummy (woodlandsmummy)
New member
Username: woodlandsmummy
Post Number: 27
Registered: 5-2008
| | Posted on Saturday, August 09, 2008 - 8:49 am: |
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haiz...i am abt to give birth in 3 weeks times...tummy sure is big enough for to differentiate if is fat or preg rite..yet be it in bus or train, they can still push me and when i told them dun push, they can still stare at me!!! |
Lenny Susanty (lenny_susanty)
New member
Username: lenny_susanty
Post Number: 67
Registered: 8-2008
| | Posted on Wednesday, August 13, 2008 - 5:20 pm: |
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hi all,
i just got pregnant and my morning sickness started to kick in and i am always bloated..
i did something very bad to this idiot who pretend to sleep. i turned my back and i farted near his face.. i think he choke man!!! muhahahaa... i don;t care if its disgusting but i think he deserves it. i told my hubby a nd he flopped!
yesterday... sam case with this young guy.. i told him before i dropped off.. eh wake up. no need to pretend to sleep cos i am dropping of liao
ahahahaha.... |
chia (joelletan)
Junior Member
Username: joelletan
Post Number: 375
Registered: 11-2004
| | Posted on Sunday, August 17, 2008 - 11:10 pm: |
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Hi all,
did not realise that so many suffered the same "fate" as i did. not getting seats, giving up seats to another more pregnant women etc.
Actually for me, my heart died long long time for a seat. Sometimes when I am lucky, I will get seats, but what really disgusted me most was how the more abled, young singaporeans would rush, push and sntached the seat that I was wiggling towards. I was very angry when such thing happned and would make a lot of funny sounds and stared hard at the person. But i do encoutered more kind souls who gave up their seats or even helped me to wake the "sleeping" person to offer me seat :> could not complain more.
I am 30 weeks pregnant now....I felt that it was always more embarrassing to ask for seats outselves. So what I usually do would to ask the person sitting next to me to give up their seats for the more needy. So, we can do each other a favour, by asking the "sleepy head" to give up seats for the more needy :> |
Jae Chong (s7870127g)
New member
Username: s7870127g
Post Number: 40
Registered: 6-2008
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 19, 2008 - 8:05 am: |
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I can remember clearly when I was in my last week of pregnancy, my stomach was so big that baby looked as though it would popped out anytime. However, nobody seemed to even stirred. People looked at me with a blank look.
Months after my pregnancy, I wanted to bring baby to take the mrt to experience what it was like to be on the train. Though I was carrying a big bag on one hand and carrying baby with the other hand, no one moved. |
irene (bear)
Intermediate Member
Username: bear
Post Number: 4475
Registered: 8-2001
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 19, 2008 - 11:41 am: |
|
Same lah...I also got the same experience. I use the sling for my 9over kg boy and have one bag on the other arm and no one give up the seat to me too when I enter the Northsouth MRT. Buay tahan...!!! |
happy forever (icdt)
New member
Username: icdt
Post Number: 87
Registered: 2-2005
| | Posted on Monday, August 25, 2008 - 11:31 pm: |
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i think we pregnant women are the Magician that can make the people whom had sat down fell alseep immediately ...
i am a preggy as well, i think most of the pple out there if they see a preggy women or with kids or old pple come standing in front and they all will fall alseep right away or hold their newspaper up so that they wont see us... or just pretend busy sms .
i actually think that guys are more willingly to give up seat to preggy / woman with kids or old pple. |
happie (hamasaki)
Advanced Member
Username: hamasaki
Post Number: 6592
Registered: 7-2004
| | Posted on Monday, August 25, 2008 - 11:49 pm: |
|
now the new trains have offered a corner seat n put up a sign for Priority seats for old people, pregnant ladies n those who children to sit. My point of view. I felt that it dun helps much lor. I took the train n saw so many pple taking up the priority seat n they cant be bothered of the signs n when the needy need to sit, they juz pretended. |
WoodlandsMummy (woodlandsmummy)
New member
Username: woodlandsmummy
Post Number: 48
Registered: 5-2008
| | Posted on Thursday, August 28, 2008 - 12:17 pm: |
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Hi, happy forever, agreed with wat u just mentioned above....me due in 2 weeks time...people can also pretend not to see me....pretend to sleep, read paper, play psp, sms, turn left, turn right, look up, look down, just dont look at my direction... |
happy forever (icdt)
New member
Username: icdt
Post Number: 93
Registered: 2-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, August 28, 2008 - 2:11 pm: |
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life is just a cycle... they have their turns to get pregnant , get kids , turn old one day.
We preggy , dun think too much as well, we stand and we treat it as an exercise lor ... for me i sit alot in the office , so it ok lah . As can see how poorly those inconsiderate pple poor acting skills then and treat it as a show ,it will make your day happier .
DUN FORGET LIFE IS JUST A CYCLE .. .. |
Joy (ahboy_mum)
New member
Username: ahboy_mum
Post Number: 24
Registered: 7-2007
| | Posted on Sunday, August 31, 2008 - 8:23 pm: |
|
Well,well, so common and sound so familiar. Believe most mum to be or mummies, even senior aunties and uncles are facing these problems when taking public transports.
All the sign doesn't help much, because these % of people are just too self centred and selfish.
I have experienced standing from Bedok MRT to Jurong East MRT when i was pregnant 6years ago, i will remember it forever.
There were few occasions, i asked politely for the seat, just for my son. It was really too crowded, my son can't even balance himself properly. My son don't mind to stand if it is non peak hour.
So..., ladies..., ask them to give up the seat if you really need it, especailly pregnant ladies or mum carrying children.
I have also met passengers who gave up the seat to my son, and i really appreciated. |
Lisa Tan (denorlisa)
New member
Username: denorlisa
Post Number: 6
Registered: 8-2008
| | Posted on Wednesday, September 03, 2008 - 12:27 pm: |
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newspaper also once did a 'test' and the lady reporter who pretended to be pregnant said that only 1-2 people gave up their seats if I remembered correctly.
Also that a pregnant lady entering any MRT carriage seems to cast a spell on everyone --- all suddenly go to ZZZ land.
After pregnancy, actually got another problem - waiting for lifts with a stroller. People try to 'cut queue', stand directly in front of the lift that is coming, and once I remembered I waited for TWO lifts to pass by me at Harbourfront because all those office people, men and women all move faster than I can EVEN THOUGH I was there first.
Disgusting... |
papa-smurf (papasmurf)
New member
Username: papasmurf
Post Number: 4
Registered: 8-2008
| | Posted on Thursday, September 04, 2008 - 8:40 pm: |
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Well, mothers and babies are not the only victims in situations that you have described. I volunteered in a charity for people with disabilities and we have impatient folks who 'leap-frog' in front of wheel chairs and crutches without remorse or empathy.
Perhaps it is the making of a society that's focused on speed and the need to 'move fast' in the name of economic progress! |
PinkTweet (pinktweet)
Junior Member
Username: pinktweet
Post Number: 225
Registered: 12-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, September 09, 2008 - 1:03 pm: |
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Can I add some comments from a different view?
Actually, there are reasons why some people wouldn't want to give up their seats. Let me quote a few real examples:
1) During morning peak hours, there will be empty southbound trains leaving Yishun MRT every 10mins. Some people purposely come earlier and miss a few non-empty trains just to wait for the empty train so that they can have a seat. Will these people give up their seats subsequently when a needy person comes into the train? Answer is most likely a "No", as they have purposely come early and wait for the empty train (ie. they made an effort for it). They may genuinely hope to catch some sleep during their long journey to work and make an extra effort to get a seat. Some staying near Khatib MRT station even make the extra effort of taking train back to Yishun station in order to get into the empty train. We can't blame them for not giving up their seat to the needy. It is only their 'luck' (or 'unluck') of sitting on the priority seat and get stared for not giving up seat. I'm one them (before, during and after my 2 pregnancies) and I will usually try to get the middle seats instead of the 'risky priority seats'. Since able-bodied people can go to such extend to get a seat, why can't those pregnant women who happen to board the train at Yishun or Khatib MRT station do the same?
2) Also, northbound trains arriving Raffles Place are usually near-empty. During evening peak hours, the northbound trains only get crowded from Raffles Place onwards. If the train become crowded, some people will wait for the next empty train if they want a seat. Will this group of people give up seat? Most likely not, cos they had purposely miss the previous train to board the next train for the seat. Why blame them for not giving up seat? I'm in the situation before and I understand. I'm pregnant before and I have made an effort to get seats before. The needy receiving seat from others should treat this as a privilege and not a right, then they will feel good. I had needed seat before and what did I do then? I opened my mouth and asked for it and the other person willingly give up his seat to me. All we need to do is to open our mouth and not wait for privileges to drop from the sky.
Hope my views did not offend you ladies. I just want to present things from a different point of view. |
Paulyn (lesummer)
New member
Username: lesummer
Post Number: 61
Registered: 6-2007
| | Posted on Friday, September 26, 2008 - 1:54 pm: |
|
Hi
Agreeing with some mummies who mentioned that the young ppl these days are just being inconsiderate, perhaps we should propose to MOE on bringing back "好公民“ back to the classrooms, which we used to have in during our primary school days.
Good habits should be cultivate at young and be kept with them for life. |
leafforme (leafforme)
New member
Username: leafforme
Post Number: 3
Registered: 5-2008
| | Posted on Tuesday, September 30, 2008 - 3:21 pm: |
|
Not only abt bring the "好公民" back, but it's how the parents teach their children when young. Its the character building.
Let alone youngster, now, the adults are also getting worse! they can push and push to get into the train before the lighting passengers get off! I've once say out loud :'whats the hurry?', the lady can turn back and tell me str in the face that there is space infront....DUHZ! there is no space lor!
Then i retort back saying: 'No, the ppl have not gotten off loh!' Luckily there's a young lady, think ard 20++, who speaked up for me, saying indeed the people have not fully got off. THen, the lady kept quiet. These ppl...they tot no one dare to say them.
tsk tsk...and we still wonder why australians dun like sporeans...haiz... |
۰۪۪۪۬۬۰♫Precious_Moment♫ (precious_moment16)
Member
Username: precious_moment16
Post Number: 532
Registered: 7-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, October 09, 2008 - 3:36 pm: |
|
Here is my story....
I was sitting on the 3rd seats of the rows.
When come to the next station, a family of 3+1 came in.. Daddy, Pregnant Mummy, Granddma carrying Granddaughter.
I Stand up and offer my precious seat (I was lugging lots of things at that time) to the preggie woman. With that I ended up standing infront of her while the grandma besides me (front of 2nd seat) and daddy is standing in front of 1st seat
As grandma and preggie tends to kip talking to each other, I offer to switch with grandma, so that she could stand in front of the preggie and chit chat.
Few station passed by, the person sitting on the 2nd seat alighted. I was standing in front of the seat, its "rightfully" my seat..
Guess what?
The Preggie quickly Shift her BIG BUTTOCK to occupy the 2nd empty seat, and let the grandma take over her 3rd seat.
I was veri fuming.. and they dun even feel the least shame on this act.
Worse is yet to come.. Since 2nd and 3rd seat are of the same family, Daddy requested to switch with me. End up Im now in the first seat. So lucky, the person in front of me alighted.. and guess again... whats happen..
Their Shameless and Selfish action nearly drown me. The ingrate preggie woman just place her Fat hand on the empty seat.. keep calling to her "Arh Lao" to sit.
And that Shameless Arh Loa, really took the seat. |
Leereiner (reiner)
Member
Username: reiner
Post Number: 993
Registered: 10-2004
| | Posted on Thursday, October 09, 2008 - 4:50 pm: |
|
whao... playing musical chairs eh? |
Leereiner (reiner)
Member
Username: reiner
Post Number: 994
Registered: 10-2004
| | Posted on Thursday, October 09, 2008 - 5:26 pm: |
|
me do have good and bad experience in the public transport...
good ones was a young man wanna give up his seat to me (me was just 5mth preggie but tummy not really big leh) but there's a gentleman rushed from the other end to sit down. so this young man told him off. then me got the seat. guess what, that gentleman alighted at the next 2 stops. huh??? 2 stops still wanna get a seat meh???
bad one is the same as everyone story lor... |
SexyMum (besexymums)
New member
Username: besexymums
Post Number: 52
Registered: 4-2008
| | Posted on Sunday, October 12, 2008 - 4:32 pm: |
|
precious moment, i think you hv a knack for narration. the way you described is humourous despite that the incident's actually so frustating....
anyway the family's actions are for all in the cabin to see. hope the daughter doesn't inherit these genes. really buay ta han... |
Pumpkin Seed (pumpkinseed)
New member
Username: pumpkinseed
Post Number: 7
Registered: 10-2008
| | Posted on Thursday, October 30, 2008 - 6:03 pm: |
|
Hey ladies,
It's quite sad to see people behaving like this.
On our part, we can take what I call the win-win approach.
If I need to sit down or see someone like old person, child, mother carrying baby who needs a seat, I politely ask the nearest available person ' Hi, would you like to give this pregnant lady/mother/elderly person your seat?", especially if they are in a priority seat.
Then when they do, I thank them and smile, so they feel good about it. I also tend to thank them again when I leave the train.
Of course, not everyone will have such a nice reaction but I've tried it multiple times, and no one has refused me so far. Mummies still in their first tri who are not showing yet, no one will know unless you speak up. So don't be afraid, just smile and be a little thick skinned. At the same time, you're showing a good example to the young people who don't have manners! |
jynnsan (jynnsan)
Junior Member
Username: jynnsan
Post Number: 493
Registered: 4-2008
| | Posted on Tuesday, November 04, 2008 - 3:53 pm: |
|
Pumpkin Seed,
You are really a kind soul
Now into my 38 weeks, i never expect anyone to
offer seat to me. |
funshine (funshinebear)
New member
Username: funshinebear
Post Number: 14
Registered: 11-2006
| | Posted on Monday, November 10, 2008 - 7:07 pm: |
|
pumpkin seed, i think you're right.... there are those priority seats in trains these days (i only realised last week).... if you think you deserve the seat, you have the rights to ask the person occupying it to give it to you....
i've seen a lady carrying her 2-year-old on the bus, and she just went to the person sitting on the seat in the 2nd row to let her have the seat... she asked in a pretty nice way "can you let me have the seat??" and perhaps the person is a student so she quickly said sure and stood up....
although i havent had bad experience when i was pregnant, but i did see one incident which made me very pissed.... i saw this lady who's quite heavily pregnant and she was walking to a seat which she spotted (near the door)... as she was walking, a strongly-built man quickly ran and sat down!!! the pregnant lady was just 3 steps away from the seat!!! and the disgraceful man just looked at his papers and pretended nothing had happened!!! the poor lady had to continue walking to look for the next seat....
think next time if i see a pregnant lady / elderly person, i would try what pumpkin seed does... |
hamteo (hamteo)
New member
Username: hamteo
Post Number: 31
Registered: 1-2009
| | Posted on Friday, December 11, 2009 - 5:49 pm: |
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agree with pumpkin seed - ask for the seat and think most sporeans will give up seat to you |
maggieHeng (maggieheng81)
Intermediate Member
Username: maggieheng81
Post Number: 3710
Registered: 5-2009
| | Posted on Friday, August 06, 2010 - 9:41 pm: |
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I think so IF GOV. FINE PEOPLE LIKE LITTERING, then will wake up.. It is no longer basic curtsy (sg lost it many yrs ago)...
I 1st time this year, took MRT train today with my elder son sleeping in stroller, carrying younger son on lap wearing a dress, purposely turn right into the special seat, and a old uncle happen to see me turn in, he give up his seat to me imm. guess what, a young girl acted sleeping, I knock her head, tell her dont fake it, she imm stand up and exit the next station, returning the old uncle his seat..
I am not someone who see and dont do.. Is must do... I am not afraid to voice it out loud(at least I got seat from Outram to Bt Gombak)... |
froggie (froggie12)
New member
Username: froggie12
Post Number: 82
Registered: 4-2010
| | Posted on Tuesday, March 22, 2011 - 3:45 am: |
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For me, during my pregnancy, most of them gave up their seats for me, be it reserved seat or normal seat. But, still got some people pretend to "never see me"...
MRT still not so bad, cos got the reserved seat sticker. Bus is worse...not even once I was offered a seat.
Usually, if it's a short journey, I'm prefectly ok with standing. But, to stand from Bugis to CCK, is a long journey... There was once I was carrying my daughter (5 mths old) and the train was packed. I walked to the reserved seat and guess what? The woman immediately shut her eyes and pretend to zzz. The next thing I did was "can I have this seat? It is reserved for those who are carrying baby." She pretend not to hear. So, I raised my voice and vola, she gave me a black face and stood up.
For me, since the seat is being reserved for us, we should fight for our rights. And, if someone refused, I would tell him or her that the seat is "reserved" in the first place for certain people and that they are not suppose to sit. I even have my IPOD tuned to the meaning of reserve / priority - just in case some people wants to argue on first come first sit basis.
However, so far I've not encounter anyone that dares to argue with me on the reserved seat.
Do you know in HK and Taipei, those seats with reserved usually are not occupied - even in peak hours. Or, they'll give up their seats automatically... |
sunny (sunny72)
Junior Member
Username: sunny72
Post Number: 492
Registered: 2-2008
| | Posted on Monday, May 23, 2011 - 11:39 am: |
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Just got this from my friend. He was standing in the MRT train this morning. Suddenly a young man who'd been sitting in front of him stood up and offered his seat to a lady who'd just come in and was standing next to my colleague. My friend took note as did quite a number of pp nearby as they were quite surprised at the sudden quick gesture. The woman was apparently wearing loose clothing and looked a bit fat/pregnant. She apparently just gave a curt shake of her head and didn't take the seat. Nevertheless, the young man didn't sit back down and continued standing until he left a few stops later. My friend saw the woman texting/emailing v agitatedly and furiously on her iphone. As he's quite tall, he accidentally caught sight of her message. He said it was filled with hokkien expletives k n n k n n! She was apparently texting a friend complaining and cursing that the young man had thought she was pregnant.
The above well illustrates why men nowadays don't offer seats to women. The young guy this morning not only did not receive any thank you for his well meaning gesture but I guess it was was 'lucky' that he did not get a verbal tongue lashing as well. Wonder if that woman ever gets pregnant if she would be flattered if no one stood up and offered the seat for her.
Personally, I've noted that of all the persons who've stood up to give me their seat when I was (and currently am pregnant), most are male. The next best group are middle aged Malay women. The worse are middle aged Chinese women (of whatever class) and teenagers (esp boy-girl pairs in the midst of cooing to one another - contrary to popular belief, the boy will not offer his seat up to impress his girl (probably because the boys prefer to continue groping their partners and in quite a few cases, the girls also appear to continue being groped). |
WoodlandsMummy (woodlandsmummy)
New member
Username: woodlandsmummy
Post Number: 92
Registered: 5-2008
| | Posted on Monday, May 23, 2011 - 3:47 pm: |
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sunny, i agreed with what u said...mostly boy gave up their seat to me when i was preg. |
quezvene (quezvene)
New member
Username: quezvene
Post Number: 89
Registered: 4-2010
| | Posted on Thursday, August 04, 2011 - 9:55 pm: |
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That day I was in a bus when I saw a poor elderly lady standing. I looked around for a seat but as it was peak hr there was none. However, I noticed that one seated lady nearby is getting ready to get off the bus but there was this young guy mid-20s in front of her. From the look of it, he seems to wan that seat. I immediately shifted next to him n made it very clear with my body language tat I wanted tat seat but when the lady got off, the guy just brushed me aside n sat down. I was quite pissed by then as being a guy I feel tat he shld be gentleman enough when a female has already made it so clear tat she wants the seat. So very loudly (so tat ppl around could hear), I said, "Sir, didn't u see tat old lady over there? I think she needs the seat more than u. Can u pls give up the seat to her!"
Haha shld hv seen his face, it was so red as he muttered a sorry n got off at the next stop. |
sunny (sunny72)
Member
Username: sunny72
Post Number: 533
Registered: 2-2008
| | Posted on Friday, August 05, 2011 - 3:24 pm: |
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Quezvene
Your intention is good but I wonder why you took such a round about way... If you were not afraid to speak out at the end, why didn't you just do so right at the beginning? Why didnt you just point out the old lady to the man right from the start instead of giving him the impression that you wanted the seat? And then embarrassing him because he didn't give way to you? Note that he didn't give way to YOU, not that he didn't give way to the old lady.
Women want to be treated equal yet still expect seats and other acts of "chivalry". Chivalry- It's nice when we get it but it should not be an expectation or a right. It is slightly different for the elderly, the handicapped, young toddlers or pregnant women who "need" as opposed to "expect", in this case, a seat. I dont know whether the man noticed and chose to ignore the old lady but I'm sure that if you had pointed her out to him from the start, you could have had a win-win-win situation for him (who gets to save face), the old lady (who gets a seat) and yourself (for being a good 'neighbour' to both). |
quezvene (quezvene)
New member
Username: quezvene
Post Number: 90
Registered: 4-2010
| | Posted on Saturday, August 06, 2011 - 1:49 pm: |
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Hi, Sunny that's because he haven't taking the seat yet. Before I could have told him about the old lady, he had already push me away. How am I to be sure that he wants the seat for himself and not like me to keep it for the old lady as well? |
sunny (sunny72)
Member
Username: sunny72
Post Number: 535
Registered: 2-2008
| | Posted on Saturday, August 06, 2011 - 2:32 pm: |
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It wldn't hv hurt to voice out or point out, look, there's a old lady who needs the seat. If he already knows n meant to give the seat up, I'm sure he wld hv just said, I know. Anyway ...I don't want to argue w you. Still think tt your methods a bit strange but your heart is in the right place so keep it up. |
Xuan (sweetevil)
New member
Username: sweetevil
Post Number: 16
Registered: 11-2009
| | Posted on Saturday, April 07, 2012 - 11:41 pm: |
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Well done! Most people will just only stare and keep quiet. |
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